Head over heels

goodbye!!

2010-03-08T00:11:00.001+08:00

we have moved!

memories since we've been together till this date will remain in here & be remembered always.

please RE-LINK us @

aandee-loveline.tumblr.com

i miss them

2009-12-30T02:55:00.002+08:00

at this very time, i can't sleep. why? because i'm crying hard, real hard.

i've missed these people so much right now. i wonder if they missed me too.

i missed their presence, the moments of sharing and laughters.

i need a sense of belonging right now.

merry x'mas

2009-12-27T00:39:00.002+08:00

"I Love You SO Muchhh"

He does love me very very much, much to the extremities. :)

okay, so yesterday was a serious night out. can say fun and all but yet shagged if you know what i meant. and for the first time i followed abg fishing. lawls. by the experience i had, it was not so boring, as claimed by others. however, while waiting for the bait to be bitten (which actually kept on going missing as Abg claimed the fished were 'clever'. lawls) , we did talked over a few things. as i can say, personal yet close to the heart.

yeah, sometimes we have to admit, certain things that we're ought to say 'okay' or just plainly being agreeable and going on with the flow isn't always good. in fact, no matter how hard we keep it, it does show all along. and i was glad enough, Abg asked me that question he kept that has been questioning his mind all this time.

as i was saying. it is not the matter of fact to really similarise someone with the past or what ever it was. however, things that were 'rotten' happened in the past and it basically 'traumatises' me in fact. that's why my answer was practically just 'disturbing'.

indeed, with all the talking, it was such a sweet night under the starry sky, counting the stars, eating tubs of ice cream and bla bla bla. lawls. family planning talks did came out as well. :))

and yes, i am officially and fully devoted to you. you're a part of my life; if you are gone, that means i'm going dead in split seconds. that explains how much i love you.

trust me, it will happen in the future.

Finally revived !

2009-12-23T18:02:00.003+08:00

hello guys ! finally we're back blogging. we've been quite a busy couple lately. hahas. yuh right. ohh well, we ARE STILL going on strong to those some stupid spammers out there or those who did once tried to shake the relationship.

so here's what is currently happening to the both of us;

farhan : currently still lazing around at home, and spending most of his 'quality' time under the block

fadilah : currently having her holidays till next year && awfully bored being cooped up at home. more plans please!!! hahas.

we believed there was a rough patch back then, oh well. lots of things did happen. nearly wrecked us up for instance. or maybe much more of 'sentimental and sensitive' happenings that happened. HOWEVER, during my 17th birthday just recently, both of us had a heart-to-heart talk and managed to pull things through. because, we were that open enough to tell what's going on with each other's thinking, our thoughts and all. :) ohh, we are love drunk. hahas.

maybe i do realise, boys are still boys. moreover, with their super urge to just get out and hang out. but, he did promise me something if i could do what he wanted. and yes, i will try to change just to get what i wanted from him. that was a promise kept and i hope he'll say what he meant. right abg?

so here are some latest snapshots, more in facebook ! :)

Twins or maybe one at a time ? :)

2009-10-17T14:27:00.002+08:00

Episode 109 .

Newborns ?

Soon, Rayaans and Marshas will result from both Aan & Dee. :) Haha. Yeah. Prefixes for our boys will be "Rayyaan" and for our girls will be "Marsha". Couple of nights ago, both of us was sitting together finding for babies names. Awww. It was sweet. Hee. I came out with the prefixes, Abg came out with the back names.

So, mummy & daddy has got decided for the first two names for a boy & a girl. Which one comes first or twins? That would be nice. :

Rayyaan Asher & Marsha Midora.

:))))

1 year 4 months cele .

2009-10-13T17:23:00.004+08:00

1 Year 4 Months

Episodee 107

Yesterday, i was far more elated to know that the plan made wasn't crashed. Okay, something did crop up the night before BUT Abg gave in and said it was "ON". hee ! yuhh indeed i cried badly when it was first said cancelled. :)

So, we went to Sg Flyer and dine in @ Popeye's. The food was okay. Rated average i can say. But we were in lovee with the mash potatoes. haha! it was superb. So, we dined in twice. Yes, twice. Approx spent was around 30 bucks for the two rounds of meal. That was because we were starving since morning ! After dinner, we headed to Marina Barrage. It was plain. For me, it was a nice landscape however Abg wasn't too pleased with it. HAHA. Cause it was bloody boring laa!

So ended up, we went touring off somewhere okay. Hehs. :DDD

Here are some random shots we took, more in facebook profiles :

1 year 4 months.

2009-10-11T00:00:00.001+08:00

Episodee 106 .

Happy 1 year 4 months sugah ! & Dee loveee Abg so much . I truly do. Okay, the picture was random. Hee. But i took it for you tho. Sygggggg, thanks for being and staying for me aite? No one can everr replace you.

Raya '09

2009-10-10T20:11:00.002+08:00

- Episode 105 -

Raya with WDL mates .

Raya with Abg's Hua Yi Mates .

In Love & Engaged . ;)

It has been a while updating this blog. Yes yes. Much of the pictures uploaded, Raya 2009 was enticingly promising and exciting with all those outings organized with friends. Besides all those bad and disastrous events which happened along the way, finally, after long days of stormy days, we've both came to a major decision. More of playing us a fair game and be just with each other. And Alhamdullilah, things work out fine since it all happened.

Tomorrow will be a year and 4 months together. Okay. We've gone far, very far. And yes. Be the last one for me. Too bad Abg's got caught up with work so we've decided to postpone our outing. Yay! Can't wait for monday. hee. ;)

Abg's in loveeee with my hair isn't he? haha! okay okay. But i'm much much in love with your hot body. HAHA! Sama-sama equal la tu alright bby?

Two more months = a pair of rings !

Time + Freedom ?

2009-09-24T01:52:00.002+08:00

Episode 104

Survive - Gabrielle

Time might get a little too tight. With the remaining time, maybe there's alot more that you can accomplish. Can we ever survive with the multitude of unpromising things life can bring? The only solution can mean freedom. It's only that individual who could make the subtle decision, am i right? It's that individual he/she could decide to get things back the way they are suppose to be. With the past, alot that we might have thrown or maybe put aside. Maybe much that we missed. If freedom is the only solution you could possibly take on, then decide and tell the people you wished you'd tell.

I understand, there's a gazillion things you might have put back. People have started to miss you, people might have wanted you to come back to where you were before. And that was back then, there was a huge barricade stopping you from doing those things. Tell me, it was me right? If this is when you;ve decided, then go ahead, meet those people and reminisce those times you've missed. Go on. Just go on.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

And here i am, awaiting for what time would bring me to.

STAY

2009-09-22T22:59:00.002+08:00

Episode 103.

Be with me like you always do.

If i were to choose, i would choose to make you stay rather than leaving me for that very long period of time. I would never give up nor back up with whatever situation it would be. I hold strong in this relationship, i really do.

Miss me like i miss you .

Stay - Jay Sean .

Sing this song for me, will you ??

free thinker.

2009-09-12T14:12:00.002+08:00

crashed. crushed. crashed.

what else??

say goodbye to me.

2009-09-11T22:59:00.003+08:00

Episode 101 .

Say goodbye to me .

Let me share my episode for today.

Finally this morning, i cheered myself up. Apologising to boyfriend cause i;ve misled him much on how much i've changed. I knew it was painful to him, but it was much for me.

Met eqa for our girl's day out together. I was very bilthe! Got our hair extensions together , then i went to get my eyelash extensions. :) That was then i was excited to show boyfriend how i looked. I was sure he would compliment me.

Enough for the great afternoon, i headed home quickly for break-fast. As soon as i;m done, i look no further and rushed out if the house to meet boyfriend. "I was so excited tau nak jumpa you tadi. I wanted to embrace you, i nak sangat hug you. I rindu you so much. And i nak our day happy walaupun it;s very short. I wanted to see you badly. And i wanted to show my new look i got today. I was sure you suka. I want to see you smile hari ni despite of all yang happen earlier. I want you."

But, it was my carelessness again. I was about to cross over to his block when i realised i got three missed calls from boyfriend. At point of time, you tau, i was fucking scared you marah. Fuck mp3. I sumpah tak letak silent mode. Tapi, too bad, i didnt manage to assure you. In the end, you left me trudging back home sorang-sorang. I did tunggu for your reply at the bus stop, mengharap you would come and pick me. But that was my angan-angan sahaja. I was sedih sayang. Cause i thought you datang and see me. Tak pun, forgive me of my carelessness. CAUSE I NAK JUMPA YOU !

Sekarang, i can't even cry. Ini last goodbye you to me? Is this the last things you nak buat to me to just show your ego sayang? You have never did this. Kenapa sekarang. I pray hard you won't get into anything. Only Tuhan yang tahu how worried i am pasal you sekarang.

- NO raya this year

- NO orang to rant out my every feelings

- EVERYONE dah start to move away dari aku

I guess i have to bawak diri this raya. Where to i don't know.

100 th !

2009-09-10T19:53:00.003+08:00

Episode 100.

It's the 100th post !!!

Hell yeah. After so long blogging, today is my 100th post. Lawl. Oh well. 100 episodes of my life. That's only a tiny drop . There's like a 'tsunami' of episodes if it's written.

Okay. So today, i felt extremely bored. I was feeling fucking locked up at home. Then i got itchy hands asking around my gfs to meet up. Unfortunately they aren't free. And yes!! talked to my online gf today. ahahs! I randomly talked to her today in msn. Partly too because it's been a while we heard each other rantings. Eqa's missed. :) And yes! Hopefully we're so going to head down ice-skating together! It was not lame by the way alright babe. Let's have our first gfs date out together soon !

Dropped by Lot One just now. Man! I was wondering aimlessly again. Haha. Shit this shopping mall has nothing. It's fucking boring. So bought myself make-up accesories and Red Earth's brow kit. Yessa! haha! like finally!

Okay. Im happy/elated/blithe etc etc etc cause our one year three months is so tomorrow. Maybe or may not be meeting him tomorrow. Oh well, its alright. Just remembering is sure enough i guess. :)

Fuck these hate-taggers. Don't they have better things to do?? Gosh. Aimlessly barging into my relationship. So my boyfriend is your ex huh? So is he already too good already or changed much till you want him back? You're just so cheap alright. That is making me feel more like banishing all those malay girls out there, right eqa?? cause they suck. These bitches can just sell off their pussies somewhere, like seriously.

Sometimes, when I say i won't do it & when i've understood enough about things that is sure gonna make YOU mad, i really mean it. My everyday means = rotting at home. Hey. When i've understood enough, where is your understanding?! I ain't pushing the labels but then it is fucking unfair. I'm all scratched inside. I have never entertain men, of all sorts, either friends or so. Then why must you??

Okay. The so last thing is = I'M SKIPPING TERAWIH TODAY. hahah! cause i'm all worked up. head's not in a good condition. been having migraine these few days. Okay! I'm so going to think where my feet is bringing me to tomorrow!!

and she said, Te Amo .

Unwritten .

2009-09-08T22:42:00.003+08:00

Episode 99

Changes.

It did happen.

Wondering why i placed that picture in this post? I mean, i did not exactly want that feet there but that arrows. Yeah, you see, sometimes you can't exactly figure out what your next move or fate would be like. It does come unexpectedly sometimes.

Bunked in again this morning with Love. Yes. I was happy, he was too. I mean, it has been a while since we spent time together. If i was a clock stopper, i would have stopped the time and make the day mine. :( Oh well, indeed, i did meet him. Yeah. I was elated just to see him first this morning.

I know, i ain't good. But yes, even if i'm drenched in sins, why would i make a halt in getting guidance from Him. I was glad enough i knew Love's cousin, Aini. She's fun to be with and we share things in common. I am deeply happy to see how i bonded with her in this short period of time. Today, after Terawih prayers, Aini and I together with two more friends went 'lepak-ing' at the playground. It was hilarious! Laughing along at how 'fanatic' we were about children. Tak sabar nak kahwin ke semua?? Hahs. Looking forward to seeing them in the days to come. At least i got some time off, laughing & smiling along with these people. :)

Sometimes, when we want and expected things the way we wanted it to be, we kind of failed. And when we failed, that is the part we have a huge downturn for ourselves. That feeling sucks and i've been experiencing it sometimes. You see, in family, in relationship, in fate, in life. Almost everything we want to shape it the way we wanted to be. There's just that one thing i'm expecting badly and i wish to see that happen one fine day. And when it happens, i won't be different no more. :) I pray hard, He will answer my prayers.

Insyallah.

Dumbfounded .

2009-09-03T15:37:00.002+08:00

You make me smile, You make me cry .

You make me live, You make me die .

You held me up, You make me fall .

But You know what?

I still Love you like i always do .

I leave it all to you, your decisions and all. I am no one no be standing in between your every ways. I realise the fact, so accepting the painful fact wouldn't be much for me i guess. I might have just hear and maybe 'pretend' that i'm smiling even when i'm not. I'm angry, I'm sad, I'm dumbfounded, I'm confused. With things that I should be accepting that will make you happy. So do it if it does make you smile. I'll smile along in sorrow and pain.

Live your life

2009-09-02T13:20:00.004+08:00

boyfriend had his hair highlighted

girlfriend had extensions **

after that due long commotions, we finally resolved to a happy ending. hell yeah. boyfriend admitted he can't just take a break from me for such that long time and for me as well! a long talk we had and yeah, met him up on monday after visiting my sec sch and we headed down to geylang to survey our raya clothes.

wondering why i had those asterisks beside the word 'extensions ** ' ?? haha. cause i'm going to revamp my hair soon! ohh yeah! hahas. this extensions is temporary cause i'm getting a fresh look this raya. hee. this raya would be meaningful cause it's the second time celebrating it with lovee! how great it is! this is just my first time being this long with someone. and gosh, lovee swept me off my feet.

today will be heading down to lovee's crib i suppose. will be accompany mum for buka. and yeah, i cant fast for the next 5/6 days due to 'the time of the month'. missing prayers too. =( saddening. but it's okay. gotta pay back the hutang puasa! hahas. okay okay, i hope today we can finally get on hands on our baju raya. lovee's got hooked on the black songket couple baju kurung and me, i'm so wearing a kebaya. be more like a girl! haha!

A day on my own?

2009-08-30T19:43:00.004+08:00

Tik tik tik waktu berdetik

Tak mungkin bisa kuhentikan

Maumu jadi mauku

Pahit pun itu ku tersenyum

Kamu tak tahu rasanya hatiku

Saat berhadapan kamu

Tik tik tik air mataku

Biar terjatuh dalam hati

Mauku tak penting lagi

Biar kubuat bahagiamu

Kamu tak tahu rasanya hatiku

Saat berhadapan kamu

Kamu tak bisa bayangkan rasanya

Jadi diriku yang masih cinta

Listen to this song by Kotak, Masih Cinta ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdym2AAmOqs )

Woke up by the sound of my phone this afternoon. And yes, shocked i was to see that the text message was from YOU. My heart was thumping hard, wondering what you texted me that noon. Apology was all i got. It doesnt matter whether the was an apology or not cause i know i failed as a person to make you at ease. I never failed to make mistakes, mistakes that will continuosly make you mad.

You are too busy, too preoccupied, too tired & now, too sensitive for the littlest things that came up. Tried to prevent things from happening but i was stupid enough to make it all happen. And now, i'm afraid to take your calls, afraid that i would repeat the very same things. I was in pain, hearing you talking with anger.

"Mauku tak penting lagi, Biar kubuat bahagiamu"

"My needs aren't important, just let me make you happy "

22 september 2009

2009-08-30T02:24:00.002+08:00

I can't sleep. My eyes are all puffed up real bad. Why must it happen now? Why must I be the one who keeps on causing shits? I really should kill myself for being the way he hates me to be. Till then, this blog will be my companion. This blog would then be my boyfriend.

I never wanted to be that way you thought I did. I waited much for you, more than you can ever imagine. Every minute i kept on awaiting by the phone. Every time my phone rang, I jumped for joy thinking it might be you. Even when it got so late, sometimes i fell asleep. But as soon as my phone rang, I woke up hurriedly to talk to you. That was how badly i needed you all the while.

22 September 2009. Almost a month counting down from today, will be the day I hear from you sayang. All this time, I have never gone sick waiting for you. I will wait, wait for the day to come by, just for me to talk to you once again.

Never have I intended to create collision with you. I wanted to sound happy. I wanted to just talk to you. I never scolded you even if you never had the time for me, I tried my best not to be ego and understand you. You told me, you sacrificed much. But I dont know where will it get us next to from now. A month, that;s long.

From now on, i'll treat this blog as you dear. Every moment i spend during the day, would be written here. I guess, I ought to be more worried of who;s going to ask for your well-being every single day, and who's going to hear your every complains or problems you have everyday. And will i get more worried of who;s trying get their hands on you, that would be the greatest fear that would come true as a nightmare.

I love you.

terlalu sadis caramu.

Distance, close the gap.

2009-08-28T19:43:00.001+08:00

i believe 'distance' is what i'm falling for right now.

so,

please close the gap immediately.

Please, BELIEVE ME.

2009-08-25T20:22:00.002+08:00

Please, Believe Me .

I Ain't Lying .

I Will Always Tell The Truth .

why would i lie? trust is of the utmost importance. i would never ever do it. even white lies, i would not. i tried hard assuring you. please, believe every single word i say. i don't wanna argue no more. i don't want the chilly air between us. break the ice, be like before.

i need my FARHAN badly.

2009-08-24T21:32:00.003+08:00

I Need My FARHAN Real Bad .

okay. exams are finally over. so yeah, i was real shagged with school and now summer break is here! ohh. Ramadhan is also here. Welcoming it with an open heart. I swear this Ramadhan, i'm opting for a better change within myself. i want the best for myself, so that others will be happy by my side. insyallah, may Allah bless me.

2 months break is already in. i once thought that i would rot at home BUT i was elated cause i've found a job at Cold Rock Ice Cream Parlour @ Holland V. so guys, come down and eat ice cream. hee. lovee is busy as well, for one month he's going to work at the Ramadhan Bazaar so yeah, both are preoccupied. meet-ups are done if necessary.

recently, a lot of mishaps happen to us. more girls are tryna get cool with him. and yeah. i was just too .. gosh. there's just no words to describe it. plus, with this hectic schedule, i admit i'm particularly more worried over things that are bound to happen if we dont spend time together. in fact, just only a few days, i just feel the gap between us. i just pray hard that things won't happen. maybe Allah is tryna test our patience in this fasting month.

whatever things that i've said, i hope you could understand. dear lovee, how am i supposed to tell you how worried and just how overprotective i am over you? do you ever realise that? i dont get mad without reason. what i just wanna tell you is that, i'm just too concerned and i get uneasy if i don't get that attention from you. you know now we dont spend much time together right? and i just can't see girls around you. i/m just too weak for that. you know how i feel. so i just want you to give the best for me. just what i need and expect from you. that's all what i asked for lovee. i need my FARHAN real bad. just be who you are to me right now.

Saved .

2009-08-10T22:53:00.004+08:00

aan loves dee.

we know it.

since last friday, both of us went busy and hectic ! hahas. yeah. it was planned. our schedule was crazyy! from bugis to orchard and bla bla bla. hahas. so friday, after school, met each other and we headed down to bugis and beach road. hahahs. we shopped for a number of things i shall say. lawl. boyfriend was finding for his side bag and we bought ourselves a pair of adidas wallet! yay! like finally. when boredom kills is both, our last resort was to catch a movie. G.I Joe was it. hahs. cool movie, guys go watch it!

saturday. hahas. yeah. both went downtown to orchard. before that boyfriend came over and we stayed in for quite sometime. he went snoring though. haha! so hard to wake him up. but nah, went down to get my laptop and like finally, i could finish up my school stuff.

SUNDAY ! hahas. HAPPY 44TH BIRTHDAY TO SINGAPORE ! lawl. okay. sunday was kinda awful CAUSE we both started work damn early in the morning. at 5 am we woke up. hhahas. bloody hell. after done with work, went down to clarke quay and finally marina to catch the fireworks. the day spend was great. heeee.

And finally, today. hahas. i was supposed to meet my bitchlovee, Sya and do our project. so yeah. planned to hit Starbucks @ Jurong point. asked boyfriend to come along. heee. cause for the week we;re not going to meet. nevermind. remember, i'll not forget myself to miss you. =)

Dear Lovee, how am i supposed to tell you how much i love you? and yes. no matter what happens, i'll always love you till the day i die. i'm not kidding and i won't let shit happens along the way. our relationship is everything to me. that thing nearly rock our boat. it nearly did. if we didnt talked things out, i was sure enough i would be dumb enough to keep on thinking it happened. I'm sorry once again. And for sure, do remember that no matter what happens, i wont leave you, never. thanks for the great weekend together baby. and we know we trashed our cash on loads of stuff. but hell yeah, the time with you cannot be bought with money for sure.

&& I LOVE YOU MD FARHAN.

Thanks.

2009-08-02T23:54:00.003+08:00

Dear Lovee,

Thanks for the very little changes you have made.

It's much much appreciated.

Thanks for doing your best.

I felt much more accepted and i have more confident in you.

If this is for the relationship, thanks to you.

Sorry for lately being not me.

I get too caught up.

But still, i want to be like i always do for you.

I apologise.

Dont get me wrong, there are no intentions to make you rage.

&& I Lovee You Always.

XOXO

screw life.

2009-08-02T23:43:00.002+08:00

dosakah aku menghalangi kebahagiaan mu?

When i once Loved you,

you made hatred come to life.

you made my life be such a turnover.

you made me learnt to live such a hard life.

you made my heart break to pieces.

you made me change to a selfish, unsensible & such a hostile person ever.

Now,

when things starts to go my way,

when the world starts to separate itself,

when i should be happy living having my lease of freedom,

I suddenly felt hatred has changed to love.

It;s decided.

We're going to be apart.

Live your life and i'll live mine.

I hope you'll be happy with your new life ahead with your man & family.

The very words .

2009-07-17T22:27:00.003+08:00

"Remember, you can't leave me and it's the same for me too. I won't leave you and that's the final answer. I won't leave you, I won't".

"No one will touch me except for you, remember that. Remember".

---------------------------------------------------------------------

"Heal my heart would you?"

"I swear i want it to dis-appear"

"I swear I Love You and i just want no one else to touch you, I really swear I do"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Undecisive Thoughts .

2009-07-17T21:25:00.004+08:00

Jealousy & Love Are Sisters. ~ Russian Proverb

That is a quote i found while randomly surfing the net on a very cold night. And yes, truly it is far agreeable. Like no matter how hard you try fighting it, it comes like a karma. Getting back to us when we seriously not needing it at all. When there is a good balance, things are great. However when one is greater than the other, obviously it threatens the whole environment you're living in. And yes, it dearly a very fatal disease you can ever experience. And here i am, finding a cure to this fatal disease which i am having right now.

Schedule are very very tight right now. Oh gosh. I'm starting work together with boyfriend tomorrow. Okay okay. Excited cause this is my very first time working together with him. And yeah. I;m hoping we'll get divided into the same team so I won't be teaming up with those people. Such a nuisance. *Do you know what is stool? It's shit* WTH. Laugh out very very loud.

Forcing myself right now to be rather in a good, sturdy mood. Cause things never get the way i wanted it to be. gosh. procrastinated like no one;s business. I need to get those distractions away. Brrrr. It occupies my mind every now and then. Forget everything and stay cool. I just need to stay in schedule!

heeeee, ecstatic !

2009-07-16T23:59:00.004+08:00

Oovoo'ing .

We have always been together .

Today's update would be simplee. Hahas! Ouh well. I just want to tell that Boyfriend is just the best! He makes my day, makes me change, makes me go bonkers, makes me go irritating and makes me go wilddd ! hhahas.

And hey YOU Boyfriend of mineee, I Love Youuuu !

Harsh Harsh.

2009-07-13T18:54:00.004+08:00

Ain't this cute?

Imagine us being like this. =)

Here I am, blogging as if awaiting for the cows to come home. lawl. Ouh well. I'm dead beat so to speak. Can say, cause i slept late yesterday night or shall i say this morning. Lucky enough lectured started late, at 12pm today. Granny was shocked to see how hard i mugged. Hahas. Ohh well, that's for sure your grandchild. What else could you expect?

School was school i shall say. And again i'm counting down the days to the megamajor exams in like a few weeks time! gosh. but it's okay. i'm trying to take things easy and i'll make sure cramming up is the last thing that i'm NEVER going to do. That's for sure or you'll see me going frantic over boyfriend.

Procrastinating. Gosh. I;ve been doing that since sunday. When i changed the blogskin. Some people is sure giving me lots of trouble. Stupid.

Msn PMs. Ah yes. I shall say. I'm quite perturbed by some bitches or shall i say bitch? singular or plural it doesn't matter. But what's the actual motive by the way? You're causing irritations to my life and my relationship. gosh. How i'd wished i could tell you off in the face. And please, no one shall ask me why or who. I just hate her.

Just looked out of the window. What a lovely sunset. Orangy-bluish skyy. =) It's superb! This week's schedule must be a little hectic i guess. Ah, computer programming exam is on friday. Revisions to catch up. And again, sunday's invitation to Sya GF's brother wedding. Lately maybe i can't meet up with boyfriend as well. Shall i say, things are kept a little low due to some personal things. But indeed, we are still good. Just hoping and praying hard things before won't brag like they used to like last time. As i just say, jealously and negative feelings of any sort kills the relationship. And I'm the bitch who'se always experiencing that to far extremities.

Better get going for now. Got to start mugging yet again. Boyfriend's maybe home late as usual. So, his text or call is what i;m awaiting for next. Out there cycling and hanging out with his friends. Alright then, Dee shall procrastinate no more.

-Girlfriend

2009-07-12T18:06:00.002+08:00

Happy Thirteenth Month !!!

Boyfriend Loveees Girlfriend.

Girlfriend Loveees Boyfriend.

sorry for the 'one-day' late update. hahs. yesterday we were too tired to even stay up late as usual after the day out at east coast again. ouh well, we did not stay the night though. it was a day's thing. hahs. ouh well. It was another awesome day out together!

okay so here we are, with a fresh blogskin. Ouh well, we finally DID realise there are some blinds stupid copycats who didnt realise that he/she copies us. boyfriend was smart enough to notice it. thank god. girlfiend on the other hand, procrastinated today. hhas!!! till 6, only an assignment was done due to the stupid change of the blogskin. i seriously need to alter okay. hahs

so here girlfriend is, at home with her assignments while boyfriend says he's out cycling. lose some extra 'things' down there okay sygg. hahas!!!

okay here are some pictures that i took for boyfriend yesterday. i was strongly convinced that he looked superbly hot laa okay with that 'Jang Geun Seok' Hairstyle. i was going fanaaatic over him yesterday, trust me!

Tagged .

2009-07-05T18:19:00.002+08:00

I've been tagged by a gf of mine, Mimie. Lawl. And i was freaking busy to do it. Finally today i rushed through before getting busy with assigments.

P.S \\ i was dumb enough to re-tag her cause i cant think of anyone to tag. LAWL/.

1. besides your lips, where is your fav spot to get kissed ?

+Boyfriend knows this best. =)

2. how did you feel when you woke up this morning ?

+Extra special! hahs. Cause I slept with Boyfriend last night. So felt great immediately when i woke up cause his back is facing me ! LAWL !

3. who was the last person you took photo with ?

+Boyfriend!

4. would you consider yourself spoilt ?

+Yes ! definitely to a large extent and this gives Boyfriend a mayjah headache!

5. would you ever donate blood ?

+Yeah! i wouldnt mind going for blood donation drives though.

6. have you ever had a bestfriend of the opposite sex ?
+One. And That's My sister lovee, Faris.

7. do you want someone dead ?

+Yuhh. There' s this someone i wish that he/she could die.

8. what does your last message say ?

+hahs. it's from Daddy laa. No need to know. He asked whether i'm back from east coast or not.

9. what are you thinking about right now ?

+hhas. my overdue PWs and assignments. WTF!
10. do you wish someone to be with you now ?

+Hahs. hmmmm. Boyfriend again! i wont get sick of him, EVERR.

11. what time did you go to bed last night ?

+Hahas! cant quite recall but i know i slept after boyfriend slept.
12. where did you buy the T shirt you are wearing now ?

+Got it when i went to SP's launch of new course at Zouk last year.

13. someone on your mind now ?

+Boyfriend !
14. who was the last person that texted you ?

+MD ROSLI -- MY DADDY. LAWL.
15. tag 8 random person to do this survey : -(just being random aite. Some has done this quiz.)
-Farahin

-Edora

-Mimie

-Watie

-Rizwan

16. who is number 2 having relationship with ?
+Single !

17. is number 3 a male or female ?

+Female obviouslyy.
^^18. say something about number one.

+FAT. Lawl. Like real. Eats alot, superrrrr hyper! and and and, I LOVE HERR!

Tawning At East Coast Park !!!

2009-07-05T18:04:00.004+08:00

Boyfriendddd Cheeky !!!
Girlfriend Slumberrr, Bleah !!!

Okay-okay. So, a new update i'm doing right now. hahs. it's been a while though. been busy with assignments, PWs and facebook-ing with boyfriend. lawl. finally, we both did spend time with each other this weekend. It was so awesome! lawl. Boyfriend planned to tawn over at EastCoast Park so yuhh, saturday morning we went there. Although we were not that much prepared to BBQ and stuff, at least we did do some things. hahs. There were much to talk about, about us etc. And yuhh. tell you what, boyfriend has been extra "MANJA" okay recently. Aww. hahas. Now, i've been taking care of him CAUSE boyfriend is turning metrosexual. hahs. nevermind. Metrosexual guys are hot so HE'S HOT TOO !

As we were saying, we are having a date out. yuhh. "Engaged" couple going for a date out at the beach. HAHAS ! funny funny. Boyfriend turned into a Tiki-Tiki Tribal man yest. cause i drew his face with powder. pictures taken are so for private entertainment ! Lawl.

Whatever it is, i hope our relationship is getting better. Yeah, recently there were much that we both went through. Thoughts were shared, feelings and every little thing kept was let out. No more of these 'shits'. I mean they kind of eat up your relationship, trust me. Promises are made and kept. Let's hold on too it baby. I loveee you. And now, i've understand you better. Better than before.

*Some extra pictures taken last thursday, hanging out after boyfriend picked me up from school*

FREEDOM !!!

2009-06-22T21:11:00.003+08:00

Escaping from reality.

Finally freed from the hell i was in before.

Yes, i chose to escape away from reality. Let me revolve around a world of my own. Now i can imagine birds flying around the blue sky while i'm lying on the plains there by myself, enjoying the serenity of life. Living in reality eats you up on the inside. But in a world that you could make up, that's the best that you can ever imagine. Now, everything's perfect and I'm blessed. Truly blessed.

-Girlfriend

Is It A Crime?

2009-06-22T11:57:00.003+08:00

Come here, sit right beside me & I'll tell you a story

which has never been untold .

To fall in love and to be in love is hard. Yes, hard. Experience it and you'll definitely agree with me. To love someone over a period of time, can get you far than you can ever expect. Over the period of time, you'll learn to love a person, that very person whom you'll be with for the rest f your life. When you have learnt that well in loving that person, there'll be more uprisings within yourself, for example; your feelings and your actions towards that person. Well, it may never be positive sometimes. When the going gets tough, just within yourself, you may decide to do the most dumbest things that you can never expect you'll do. Is it a crime to be in love and to miss someone so much? It's that ' i want you here right now' kinda feeling that seems to be bothering you all the time. But yet sometimes, you just don;t know how to overcome it.

And yes, i've fallen in love with him and i've learnt loving him till to the extend right now, it gets me dumbfounded in the ways im trying to overcome what i'm feelings . Im sorry, it has been harsh this time around. But i just cant seem to find my ways in brushing everything aside.

-Girlfriend

1 Year Anniversary !

2009-06-12T21:22:00.005+08:00

1 Year It Has Been.

Growing Stronger & The Love Will Never Fade Away.

We Lovee Us.

Yes yes! finally the day has arrived. hahas! ouh gosh. how happy and excited we are about the celebration we are going to have. okay okay okay. first of all, i would like to say thanks to ALL those babes and hunks who have wished us Happy Anniversary ! hahas. much much appreciated okay people. like seriously!

So yeah. Boyfriend arrived a lil late when he fetched me from school. hahas. then we both headed straight to chinese garden. So.... when we both arrived there, we sat on the seats which was near the lake. so, the wind was breezy, and I handed over my gift to boyfriend. boyfriend was shocked to see that 'famous amos' bag and tin. hahas! then, i read to him my anniversary wish personally on the card i wrote. okay. boyfriend suddenly was like startled. hahs! okay maybe that was too sweet for him. hahas! wah chey! then3, i was far too excited to open up my gifts from boyfriend cause, there was two boxes of presents and for real, they are wrapped with dora the explorer gift wraps!! hahas! it was a very cute storage box and also an antique music box. awww. that was so sweet of boyfriend okay!

then, came the next surprise. hahahs. i brought food which was personally cooked by myself! hahs. it was boyfriend's favourite dish, fried char kway teow. hahas! sorry boyfriend, no cockles inside. i only managed to put in squid. hehs.!

camwhoring was the next activity! hahs. okay there is alot of pictures we took. so, everything was uploaded in our facebook profiles. people go check it out if you want to. hahahs. funny funny. but however, this is so unbelievable. 1 year! yes yes! hahahs. this will go on till forever sygg. and yes, i was shocked to know boyfriend was asking his siblings for their opinions in what to buy for me okay. hahs. but whatever it is, im just touched and i feel appreciated in this relationship. i loveeeee boyfrienddd!!

HAPPY FIRST ANNIVERSARY BABYYYY!!!!!

2009-06-10T21:50:00.009+08:00

HELLOOO BOYFRIENDDDD!!!

HAPPY FIRST ANNIVERSARY BBY!!!

Bby. hahas. okay okay. THIS is the first surprise, posted when the clock strikes 12. hee. Yuhh. This is somewhat different right? instead of the normal sms's i sent you every 'monthsary'. hahahs.

ehh. see see that lego block im holding? hahas. i was doing that not out of boredom really, but just to add up something so it wouldnt be so plain.

Okay sygg. first of all, i would not wanna wish much in here CAUSE i'm making it live tomorrow. hahahhas.

but anyways dear, i just want to say, yet again, that it's really unbelievable okay till our first year now it has been. its like waking up in a fairytale story. thanks so much for being in this relationship, staying faithful and giving me the best love and attention that i needed all this while. i just love you baby, a lot more than anything else i own in this world.

P.S : I'm UBBER excited for tomorrow PONYO !!!!!

I was blessed because I was loved by you

Penyu Lovee Ponyo

2009-06-08T22:33:00.003+08:00

That Penyu-Face.

Obviously showing retardness after thinking about the event that's taking place in three days time.

UBBER EXCITED !!!

Okay-okay. hahas. seriously, i look like a 'retarded-penyu'. hahs. ouh well. i was cracking my head thinking about the plan for this coming 11th. hahas. super-excited alright ! hahs. ouh well. suprisingly i managed to come out with something. and trust me, it'll going to be a day for the both of us to remember! hahs. see, BF has always asked me to plan things. hahs. like duhh. i'm a good planner right bby?? hahs.

So here I am, going to tell BF through this entry what im planning to do ;

Since I'm NOT letting you use your money you have set aside for your bike pracs, WE are both going to Chinese Garden. Hahas. well, trust me it'll be a nice place to chill out AND to camwhore alright !!
Okay, next, FOOD. hahas. okay BF is surely drooling over this already. BF need not worry cause i've planned something. Just that don't be mad if it gets cold by the time we reach the garden. hahs. cause im bringing it to sch before meeting him.
With the 'things' i've bought and ORDERED, hahas, i'm sure it'll be much much 'sweeter' laa okay. hahas. reason being, BF wouldnt be expecting me to do all these. trust me he wouldnt expect THIS. =)
LASTLY, hahas. yuh i know i didnt want BF to waste his money BUT BF HAS TO pick me up after I finish school. Muahahaha. That's a MUST. Compulsory okay bby. And anyways, i'm like bringing quite a number of barang-barang you know. Later paiseh laa bby.
AND AND AND !! i've also planned another surprise when the clock strikes midnight okay bby. BE SURE to open this blog and see what's in store for you.

GOOD !! like finally i thought of a number of things in a go. man. thats a few hours okay. hahs. reason being, i want BF to be super-touched on that day. hahas. im confident that he will be. wee!

2009-06-02T22:51:00.003+08:00

"Because that very words you said, touched me alot and it made me realise how much i mean to you - Girlfriend"

And as I look into your eyes

I see an angel in disguise

Sent from God above

For me to love

To hold and idolise

And as I hold your body near

Ill see this month through to a year

And then forever on

Til life is gone

Ill keep your loving near

And now Ive finally found my way

To lead me down this lonely road

All I have to do

Is follow you

To lighten off my load

You treat me like a rose

You give me room to grow

You shone the light of love on me

And gave me air so I can breathe

You open doors that close

In a world where anything goes

You give me strength so I stand tall

Just like a rose

And when I feel like hope is gone

You give me strength to carry on

Each time I look at you

Theres something new

To keep our loving strong

I hear you whisper in my ear

All of the words I long to hear

Of how youll always be

Here next to me

To wipe away my tears

And now Ive finally found my way

To lead me down this lonely road

All I have to do

Is follow you

To lighten off my load

And though the seasons change

Our love remains the same

You face the thunder

When the sunshine turns to rain

Just like a rose

- Like A Rose by A1

Counting down !!!

2009-05-31T12:44:00.002+08:00

Counting down 11 more days to our first Anniversary !!!!

11 Monthsary! =)

2009-05-16T12:23:00.003+08:00

I Swear I Love This Guy, Till The Day I Die.

Okay-okay. Today isn't my 11month anniversary cause literally it was like 5 days back. I didnt had the time to update our blog actually as this past few days i've been back home late BECAUSE i was meeting BOYFRIEND almost everyday ! hahs. fun fun! Boyfriend has been fetching me from school, sending me as well. Oh, i felt like im in cloud nine! hahs. How nice it wsa to tell others that my boyfriend is doing that for me. And they will be like, WOW, he's so sweet!!! And i will smile like a feline. =)

Okay so these few days i've been spending time over at Boyfriend's sister's place. hahs. It was fun i shall say. Especially with the kids around. Yesterday Boyfriend has been experiencing my PMS symptoms. hahs. he's like having stomach cramps and is feeling very thirsty these few days. aww. pity you laa bby. take good care of yourself alright bby??

Our 11month was simple. hahs. i met boyfriend at his place then fetch him to then go to his sister's place. there was a little complication cause i wasnt feeling that well but luckily nothing happened. so yeah. i bought boyfriend brownies. haha! it was a random gift cause i was schoolong on that day. and anyways, these few days, boyfriend and i has been spending quite a lot. so we are quite broke so to speak.

* Okay I just met boyfriend yesterday AND YET i'm already wanting to meet him again. So i should assume he's my drug and i'm already addicted to him. *

LOVEE LOVEE !!

2009-05-04T21:17:00.005+08:00

LOVEE LOVEE !!!

Okay2. So today was actually the sweetest day i could ever make out. haha. ouh well, Boyfriend surprised me on a very very last minute basis to meet me today after school BECAUSE he wanted to buy for me the necklace that i was yearning for all this while. gosh bby. my heart was really melting away.

Okay okay. as you can see from that picture above, Boyfriend bought me the necklace at Helen's. haha. man. it was effing niceee! why? cause it was specially chosen by Boyfriend!! HAHA. the pendant was a two-heart pendant. so it was basically representing us! =) Then, we walked through the mall and drop by more than words. AND, guess what? haha. Boyfriend saw his favourite plush, Nightmare Before Christmas, and yeah. he decided to buy for the both of us. Cutee kan perangai??? Okay! You wanna know where Girlfriend place her plushie? Look at the picture BELOW :

Cutee right?? HAHA.

So today, im like so FEELING-FEELING Boyfriend. Until i wore his T-Shirt on. haha! ehh bby. thanks alot laa sygg. I've never felt like melting away so much like this!!!

SO okay. In school now. What happened?? Sya and Dee SLACKED bigtime today in Mechanics Lecture. haha. so yeah. wanna see what we did??

School, Bukit Batok, BBDC, Home. =)

2009-04-25T00:18:00.002+08:00

Webcam Galore!

Every friday, my classes ends at 12pm and BF's school ends at 11. So, we both planned to meet up every friday and if possible every weekends cause we have to so called set aside time for the both of us. hahs. hey. it like i've been missing so much doinks! finally got to meet him today.

BF waited for me at Clementi then we both headed down to bukit batok cause BF has to pass some stuff to his friend. BUT the moment BF knew i still didnt eat my breakfast and lunch, he dragged me down to westmall and we ate at BK. haha! funny funny! After passing the stuff to his friend, I then accompanied BF to BBDC cause he's having his prac today.

Okay, okay. I have something to tell. Today was the first time i saw BF rode a bike. HAHA! well. he looked good in the helmet and yeah, when he was on the bike. haha! can;t deny what right hotstuff? im waiting for that day when he finally get his bike. Okay, confirm i'll be the first to henyak the bike. Kesian BF.

Today was tiring though BUT it was fun. Of course, meeting BF what. How can it be boring?? hahs. it's always gerek!! We even had the time to sit at mac and used the laptop. BF was busy with games and then we webcammed like no one's bussiness!

" Lovee, it takes so much to be in this relationship and i ain't gonna let anyone destroy it just like that. I know I love you and yes, it's final. If there's going to be another someone in the picture, trust me i'll make that bitch gets herself out of this. "

Friday Fiday Friday.

2009-04-17T21:03:00.002+08:00

Those Times BF took me from sch. =)

The best of memories.

Holla peeps! hahs. ouhkay now i sound like Dora The Explorer. I don't know why the hell am i so engrossed in that cartoon and yeah. it's like a massive retard being childish. hahs. BF has to cope with that i agree. Ouh i forgot! BF is Dora's partner, Diego!! Hahs!!

Ouhkay. So today,i was supposed to go to sch and buy my books and course notes. So yeah, BF accompanied me to sch after he's done with his sch. hehs. BF, thanky kays sygg if i seem to trouble you and stuff. Lagi u were bringing a truckload of stuff. =)

The weather was extremely hot today. BF & I were sweating like mad! Hahs. Man, we had to always find a COOLING place to at least cool ourselves down. Done with my sch, we both headed down to Bugis and went downtown to Sungei Road. Yeah. That flea market i shall say. It was my first time and BF's second. It was ouhkay exceptionally for the hot weather again of course. hehs.

Then BF sent me back home. hee! Thanky2 sygg. Headed to cotton on then went threadinf BF's eyebrows. hehs. Kay, dah cantik kays b. All well-trimmed = thanks to GF!!! hahs!! So went the time was up, we both got to head home. For me of course, i got grounded by momma cause i fail to be home early before this. hehs. But yeah, i was so DEGIL and verryy LIAT to go home. Yeah, seboleh-boleh wanna sit with BF until he balik. hehs. kepala batu right ur GF? =)

ILYSM Bby!! hehs.

Happy 10thMonthsary!!!

2009-04-10T22:36:00.002+08:00

Happy 10thMonthsary b!!

ILY!

Baby Boo!!! Hahs. Gosh. Ouhkay,ouhkay. Firstly, I'm writing this entry for our 10thmonthsary tomorrow but yeah, we so-called celebrated it today since both are'nt free. =)

Today, I was farly too excited about today's plan. Hahs. So yeah, i DIDN'T snooze my alarm clock. Woke up straight and headed to bathe. Then called Boyfriend to wake him up. Hahs. Bought our breakfast then I went down to Lakeside to meet Boyfriend. =)

So today, again, hahs. we basically just chilled by the beach. yeah. but man, there were loads of people due to the holiday of coursee. Halfway thru, there was a heavy downpour. Man, we were so drenched! Hahs.

So yeah, after the wet,wet situation, Boyfriend & I went to had dinner (so to speak) at Mac. Boyfriend was so freaking funny with his jokes as per usual. I was so sakit perut luhh kan, laughing non stop. Hahs. Soon after that, it was CAMWHORING!!! Pictures were uploaded at our facebook profiles btw. =)

Happy 10thMonthsary yeah b. We've already gone this far & I promise you, this relationship will go on, everlasting. Despite the worst things and those bad moments we've been through, I hope we learnt much from experience and in future we could be better. b,ILYSM alright? Promise me you'll always love me till forever.

SUSHI FIEST!!!!

2009-04-08T20:48:00.003+08:00

Sushi, Sushi, Sushi.

Girlfriend's Entry. =)

Ouhkay! Hahs. Woke up at 10 30 AM actually today but as usual, i snoozed my alarm clock thinking it was still early to get up. Hehs. So yeah, my hp when snoozing till 12PM then i finally called Bby's crib. That's finally when i got up and get dressed to meet boyfriend.

At around 3PM, I met boyfriend and again, "Sorry for being late ouhkay Sygg! I didnt mean to though,was caught up at home!". Then we proceeded to Popular and bought my stationeries. Boyfriend was so particular in choosing the things. Hahs. He was like scrutinising each and every pen etc to see whether there were defects or not. Even the slightest ones, I was asked to replace it. Hahs.

After all the shopping was done, including clothes and etc, we FINALLY proceeded to buy FOOD! Hahs. Boyfriend was so hungry and yeah, we bought a total cost of nearly 12 Bucks of sushi I think? Hahs. A lot right?? Thats not it,then came OCK and Bubble Tea. Man, we are so ready to go makan, makan, makan! =)

Boyfriend Oi! Hee. Thanks Once again for accompanying me today yeah. And again, my hutang is already paid up kays which is your sushi. Hehs. =)

The telur burst, burst, burst in the mouth. Funny funny!!

helooo ppl..aan here..my ferz time in my lyfe doing tis blogger

2009-04-07T23:35:00.003+08:00

heheheheheh...helo3...aan e big fucker is here...

actually i dun noe wt 2 write r..but nvrm..i try hor..hmm.tomorrow(8April) im goin 2 met my

hunny..at lot1..yeah..miz her alot even we hv met 4 last 2 or 3 days ago...guess wt ppl...she

wanna blanja(treat) me sushi..wohoo..my fav..i will ask her 2 buy alot 4 me..hahah...serve u

right!!!hahhaa..k lr..tat it 4 today..i hv no idea wt 2 write animore..so im goin end here..

bye2 ppl..

To ppl : Thx 4 reAding my composition..hhaaha

To BBy : Ana Uhib Buka..weee

=(

2009-04-02T23:38:00.003+08:00

& again boyfriend, i want to really apologise for putting high hopes on that. Seriously, I didnt mean to. Moreover, I ,too, was hoping that I could have a wonderful time with you guys. If I'm free to make decisions, then only i wont let you down. I feel bad about it. I just want you to spend time with your family alright? It's just for a day, make full good use of it. I'm sure you'll be fine. & yet again, I promise you to make up for this occasion that I miss alright? We'll meet up often before sch reopens. I promisseeee!!!!

*Girlfriend is highly nervous and yet excited for the orientation tomorrow.gosh.I'm gonna be such a loner! aarrghh!!*

Beach Datee Version 2.0

2009-03-31T23:55:00.004+08:00

Beach Date Version 2.0

Superb!

And yes again, we planned for another date out at the West Coast. Actually it was due Wednesday, but then boyfriend turned out to be not working. So we advanced it by a day. Hell yeah. Both of us we such in a rush. Waking up straight & got ready. Hehs. And again, as if it was planned, both were wearing black. boyfriend/girfriend sibukk luh! hahs.

Exactly the same spot as the previous date, we pitched our tent under the big shady tree. Hahs. It was just another great sunny afternoon to spend together! =)

New Fetish! The Bird & The Bee.

2009-03-29T13:51:00.004+08:00

Currently I'm getting myself head over heels over this band called "The Bird And The Bee". Well, the band is kind of vintage or some sort retro i shall say. The songs are superb! So this video is my all time favourite song called Love Letter To Japan. Hehs. Japan aye?

Hello Cyber World!!

2009-03-28T19:56:00.003+08:00

Off to a new start.

Ouhkay guys, we're both having a new combined blog.

It's going to be Aan's as well as Dee's!!

Friendship.

2009-03-28T01:53:00.003+08:00

Friends.

Im Over & Done With.

Leave It With The Best Of Memories.

Only Kaprat!

2009-03-27T14:55:00.003+08:00

Stan Lovee Antu.

Only Antu.

Currently I'm dead beat. Still,after yesterday's great outing. hahs. well,i'm very sleepy so to speak but i can't just get to bed till yet. Bby's out for the moment so i'm literally waiting for him to return home. =)

Yesterday night, I had another 'let-it-out' session with Bby. Yeah, it's almost ten months and yet we're keeping things shut tight. I learned from the past, basically letting go of what we feel was the best solution we can possibly work out. Now, I'm very satisfied, at ease and i'm very self-assured after what we've talked and worked out yesterday.

Sleeq's "Jangan Sampai Terlambat" song is my current playback song for the moment. I mean,i'm not crazy over the boys but this song kind of sets the mood for the time being. Suits it like some sort. Hahs.

*Remember, I ONLY lovee you & no one else. You're what i need from now till the end. & yes, again I promise to lovee you till forever. ILYSM Md Farhan*

Beach Date!

2009-03-26T23:37:00.002+08:00

Captured Moments.

Make It Last Forever.

As planned,bby & I went down to chill at West Coast Park.hahs.well,it was so called a change of
environment cause we're sick & tired of 'lepaking' under the block. I mean,at least we can think of another way to lease and spend time together. =)

So yeah, I shall say I had fun today. I mean,things were mediocre and plain as in we didnt prepare food earlier etc but then by just being with the person you lovee,things were just so picture-purrrfect.

Again,camwhoring was the main thing we did.What was there to do with a camera? hahs.so yeah.moments were captured for memorabilia purposes.

Well,times like these are really good in a way to spend with bby.I mean,days gets hectic sometimes so at times we cant get to spend ample time together. So Bby,this goes to say we need to have more outings or 'dates' like these i shall say.Hahs! take notice kay,compulsory!!

Trust.

2009-03-24T23:20:00.002+08:00

Am trying hard to earn your trust.

assurance

2009-03-24T23:10:00.003+08:00

How can i ever assure you? It Hurts to hear you say those things. When can you ever just going to believe me? That's the only thing im asking cause it hurts plainly to always see you thinking way far negative about things.

PMS.Sucks Bigtime.

2009-03-24T21:43:00.002+08:00

Stanwyck's Unscripted But True.

Finally Over & Done With.

Well,for this entry I'm just going to literally put it in simple sentences. Hope it explains.

Whatever kept inside for 'decades' long has finally been let out in two different ways; at ease as the river flowing and also violent as a volcanic eruption.

How a relieve it was. Simply because you have waited for quite a long time. But hell,it was too hard to just speak out those words cause it was described plainly as 'unreasonable', 'stupid' & just 'crap'.

Trust was what it takes. It's now or never. By just a word of mouth, maybe you just can't assure someone that you could be trusted. Maybe by proving it, with actions and other things of some sort could make the person trust you. Eventhough you know that things wouldnt happen and you tried your best telling the person and wanting so much to be trusted, what else can you do if he/she insists that it's still shaky or unclear that the 'trust' still can;t be assured? Wait, I'm proving it. From now onwards,just for you.

Yes, maybe it hurts or it's sad to hear what was being told but who can escape from reality? the truth? it's hard to digest,but i am slowly forgetting it.

Assurance. That's what i'm doing. Trying my very best reassuring that you;re just the one, i'm creating solutions that'll best suit and maybe adding advantage to the relationship. And again, limitations. It's ouhkay to lose other things in the world, but not you.

But whatever it is, I Love You.

*Uuurgghh.PMS sucks bigtime.It;s making me feel bad. So bad that it's making me worse-off.Fcuk!*

Jealously strikes.

2009-03-12T12:49:00.002+08:00

I know this sounds weird ; It's just plain jealously. That's what i felt at times,maybe always maybe not. Can't hide this no longer but i just can't take it anymore.

9MTHSARY.TRAGIC ENDING.

2009-03-11T23:47:00.002+08:00

Why exactly people are born to be not perfect? Yeah.God made us that way right? and of course we can't change things the way they are.Certainly,some things could be changed but it takes our ownself to decide.

I feel so helpless.When there was a chance to speak up and to let him know what i wanted,i was just far too coward maybe or just plain keeping myself shut.gosh.what the hell is simply wrong with me??I knew what I wanted & certainly i knew what WE wanted. But hell,i just made things worse!

Attention.that was just the key thing that was needed.I knew and i planned to make our day the best and seeing you smile,makes me blithe! But seriously,i was far too stupid,didnt think about the outcome.I really wanted to spend my day with you but hell i screwed up everthing.i just screwed it up.fcuk.

I just hope we really cleared things up.When i thought back on what we both said,it was seriously a clash point between us.

P.S : Happy 9mthmonthsary,ILY.

BACK IN A PIECE AND IN PEACE.

2009-03-07T12:22:00.003+08:00

Limitations,Conceited.

Ouh well.For the meantime,i'm going to put on a halt on some things.First of all,to dearest boys esp friends and besties,i'm trying to limit myself especially in socialising .Yeah.as i can say,i may be quite different right now.gee,i really hope u guys know what i mean based on the previous entry right? hmm. I'm still the same Siti/Dee you know but yeah,as i say i'm going to change a lil bit alright.accept it straight cause i'm doing the best for myself and my loved one.truthfully,who doesnt get green eyes seeing or hearing your partner with another person right as in friends/besties being far,far too close to each other?i know how it feels and actually sometimes i do feel the same way as he does.that it why i had to do this.i don't want any of us to keep all this crap inside our hearts,afraid sooner or later it'll burst.

I Love You

FCUK!!! THAT FCUKER!!

2009-03-07T00:43:00.003+08:00

Sumpah Mati, I Love You.

Ain't NEVER gonna do shit to our relationship.

Today,my day started great.Really great.i met bby when he finished sch.so we had to run some errands before i headed to Faris Bestie's birthday bash.

When the time came,i headed to meet faris straight.the plan was actually to kinda distract him and to delay the time cause the girls need to prepare the deco n stuff.hahs.so yeah.i made my way,practically wasting my time to yishun,Northpoint.TRUTHFULLY and HONESTLY faris and i were just buying food and we just filled our empty stomachs.so yeah.we headed behind northpoint and sat like two anak terbiar eating like no one's bussiness.then what we ONLY did was camwhore.taking pictures cause it's been a while since we did.

After getting the queue call from the girls, i headed straight to BottleTree and I had to blindfold the birthday boy.Using simple LOGIC,i had to hold him and guide his way through along the way.

Birthday boy was far too elated and he teared when he saw the surprise.we were happy cause we made his day. Once again,Happy 17th Brthday BESTIE.

My day was far too great with bby and besties BUT it turned really SOUR because of some fucker's mouth.gosh.i was seriously so shocked and startled when bby called me in a very harsh and cold manner then he told me what happened.hell yeah i was shocked when bby told me that fucking friend of his saw me with a guy,doing things which i aint supposed to be doing.fcuk man.

i was seriously agitated and yet freaking sad when bby sounded as if he didnt believe me.what i could rely on was just praying hard to God that things wont go outta hand.that fucker tarnished my image and made me sound as if im cheap and i could go along with any guys so simply.fcuk man.mind YOU,im not like other girls u see outside.seriously im not even near ouhkay.talked to bby on the phone and he said he wanted me back in one piece.i admit im shattered into tiny bits and pieces.i promise you and insyallah,i'll heal soon alright syg?

* I know i'm not in the wrong and that is why I could post this up in this blog entry.im not a coward and i LIVE BY MY WORDS.eventhough u'd try to tarnish me and my relationship,hell yeah,sooner or later u're gonna get it.there's always a pay back time. But whatever it is,whatever motive u have,it's not gonna get u nowhere. YOU SUCK.GO FUCK OFF BASTARD!!!!!!!*

Happy yet Shitty. Fcuk!

2009-03-04T23:53:00.001+08:00

Dee Lovee Aan Ouhkay.

U Make My Day Baby.

Woke up quite early today I shall say.yeah cause basically i was far too excited that I'm going to meet bby today! hahs.well,i picked up bby from school and then sent him back home.aww.how sweet.right3?

It's been quite sometime I met bby.yeah,i admit i miss like mad! hahs.how can i not miss him.i was away in Malaysia for a few days as i got to attend a wedding there.so yeah.today i got to lease out my rinduness!

took some pictures as well.yeah.it's been a while since we've camwhore together.hahs.so lucky i reminded bby.at least there's some new peektures for me to look and smile at when i miss him.*wink2. And by the way bby,you make my day today. I love you so much sayangku.

to that fcuking asshole out there,please stop whatever you're doing.cause ur deeds are making my family's life topsy turvy.it's because of you my family became shattered like pieces of broken glass.im just waiting for the right time to make a solid return to you.just wait till my patience has reached my limits.you're gonna be so dead.

and to that someone out there,it's ouhkay for you to hate me cause i'll never hate you.but now,with what u've been doing,you're making me hate u even more.i'm not being rude but i cant stand the pain.because of what u're doing,im leading a very harsh life now.i repeat,VERY harsh.thanks a lot.i'll never forget this my entire life.

Relieved.

2009-02-24T23:33:00.002+08:00

Bby.

I Just Love You So Much.

Well yeah.reffering back to the previous entry,i got bby's reply late evening as soon as he reached home.i was relieved to see bby's text message but wasn't truly happy and felt so dumbstruck when i was told what happened.gosh.i felt like stabbing that crap with a butcher's knife,i'd tell you.seriously i couldn;t bear seeing my loved one being treated that way.sure thing it's not his fault.im mad,agitated and also sad at the same time.but of course it's not against bby but that crap of course.

bby called in earlier.we talked for a while and again bby told me about what happened.gosh.actually i was refraining myself at the same time from getting way too emotional.so yeah.at least i felt at ease cause i gotta hear bby's voice.

I Miss You.

I Love You.

I Need You.

Always,Forever.

2009-02-24T17:46:00.002+08:00

How I Wished This Would Last Forever.

I Love You A lot Bby.

struck down by fever.yeah.the weather seems unpromising i shall say.it's been raining all day.since yesterday night,i was having chills.as a result,i got fever today.

well,maybe it's due to me thinking about what is going to happen next.i mean,today is it.till now,i'm waiting for bby.he hasn't called nor text me since noon.i hope nothing happened cause i'm so not ready to hear that.i really want thing to clear up.if only it was as easy as 1 2 3,we could just turn back time and make it not happen.

P.S : awaiting for your replies bby. ILY so much.

Sayaannnggg,Gue Syggg Sama Kamu!!!

2009-02-23T12:51:00.005+08:00

Stanwycks

It's Gotta Be Gucci Baby.

yesterday,i went down to a wedding invitation.Well,it was Abg Yazid's wedding.It was unexpected that the wedding reception was at jurong west and it was so near to bby's place.hahs.i was happy cause i knew how to make my way and most importantly,meet bby! =)the reception was ouhkay.i loved the deco,black and yellow.hahs.if its mine,i'd make it black,red and white.give it a little classy plus vintage kinda thing.that'll be lovely.abg arep was damn irritating and funny as usual with his buttcrack jokes.wth.

so hours later,i met bby and followed him and his brother to go get some psp accesories.we chilled at the void deck soon after and do some admin stuff.hahs.indeed after that by sent me back to the reception but hell yeah.the day ended great,right bby? hahs. *only we know.

however,the night spend was great.yes.we had the best convo ever on the phone.hell yeah,there were loads to talk to and bby was being as sadistic as ever.even had to time to create a game tt was to shut our gaps for 5mins and then put down the phone.hahs.i was reluctant to put down cause i wanted to drag our convo a little longer.it was soo unexpected that bby read my blog! hahs.gosh.all this while i've never thought he read my blog.yeah,serious.goddamnit i was blushing.hahs.yeah.because i can say that i do nothing but blog about him,him and only him.so yeah.of course i was blushing luhh.well,i do hope we're going to be like this whenever we call.hahs.and again,someone was emphasising on himself looking way similar to Taufik Batisah.hahs.who ey bby???

well.we had full of crap-talk so there'll be some serious moment somewhere,right?actually i was a little taken aback yet a little speechless so to speak when bby said,

"bi,i feel that we'll have only a few time left to spend with each other.I'm not saying that i'd be gone forever but maybe it's only a while.haish."

who would ever want to part with the person you love right? well.as for me.i'm not even ready and also accepting it if it happens.gosh.cause i need him everyday.starting the day with his sms's wouldnt be complete.although he's not physically there with me,at least mentally i know he's with me.he's my source of happiness.there's no one other than him could make me feel so complete,conceited.

well bby,i'll treasure every moment we have.we gotta spend it fruitfully and make full good use of it.i'll always be there for you no matter what happens.Ain't gonna leave nor hate you,i never will.cause you'll have to remember that i'm gonna spend the rest of my life with you and i'm sure it's going to happen.

P.S : I LOVE YOU. understand bby??

Worrying.

2009-02-21T21:32:00.003+08:00

oh god.oh god.oh god.please.im not ready for whatever that's going to happen.yeas,im not sure whether it'd going to happen or not but im praying hard that it's not going to be.my tears aint running dry each and everyday since it happened.why?yes this is part of life but this shouldnt be it.it's some other stupid shitass who has made this problem happen.

everyone's worried sick.family,friends and myself.im not ready to face and accept this if it happens.the root of it didnt come from him so why should he be the one at stake??whatever you;ve said to me i'll keep it strong,aint going to break it.im too fragile,afraid,so afraid to part with you even for a while.my every breath is you.without you i'll get frail everyday.

for now,i'll just hope for the best.insyallah.things will go the right way.Allah always be on our side alright? If things are going to happen to you,im going to damn that fcukin shitass forever.

P.S : I LOVE YOU.

Blissfully Calm.

2009-02-21T13:46:00.004+08:00

Finally, Back On Track.

Everything Solved.

literally,i just got back from meeting sygg together with nenek. yeah right. suprising huh?but indeed it happened.the actual plan was to meet him at lot 1,maybe to chiil out for a while before he attends his family occasion. but instead,nenek wanted to meet him too. hahs.so yeah.told sygg and he was like, "u serious bi??". so we kinda chatted under the block luhh. didnt knew it could be quite long cause sygg had to rush a.s.a.p. so sorry sygg.hee. but yeah.indeed after we met,nenek was relieved cause she finally met up with her cucu's boyfee.haha.i was happy cause we merely solved every misunderstandings and stuff.yeah,at least nenek got to hear from sygg himself right? gladly,she was only just giving advice on our relationship.thank you so much nenek for understanding me.and ouh yeah! guess what?? nenek mentioned that sygg looked like Taufik Batisah luhh seyy! ceydebah.tk bley angkat!!!

P.S: So how?? Similar?? Hahs.

Setbacks. =(

2009-02-20T00:21:00.004+08:00

Don't Let Me Fall Into Your Setbacks Again

Because It Kinda Hurts.

Please,I'm begging you once and for all. Stop creating setbacks against me. You know how am I. I can't even differentiate between jokes or being serious. I take things seriously and I believe to every single word that you say. But,don't let me waste my tears or unneccesary energy being agigated or mad at you. You know me well right? So yeah. I hope things like this won't happen like that again cause i really didn't all those 'crap' to happen. What i expected just didn't turn out to be the way it was supposed to be.

P.S : Like I've always said, i don't like wasting my time getting into tiffs with you cause it doesnt mean a thing at all esp if it's you. I hope you understand.

Enough said,let's get over and done with this

thing alright.

No matter what,ILY.

happy 8thmonthsary baby!!

2009-02-11T15:51:00.002+08:00

With your T-Shirt On.

Happy 8thmonthsary Baby!

I'll Love You Till The Day I Die.

yay!finally the day has come. it marks 11 of February and and and..it'll be our 8th month together!! gosh.how esctatic can i be.hell yeah,it's already a long way.well,i'm more than happy cause yeah,we've stayed together eventhough there was like tons of barriers and some other 'shitties' along the way. we still made it. baby,no words can describe how much i love you. thanks once again for letting me be the one in your life. you showed me life. you showered me with love which no one else does. it doesnt matter if we're different but yet,we are not when it comes to 'heart matters'. =)

basically,we couldnt meet up and celebrate it due to his sch.so yeah,we were planning to celebrate our monthsary cum valentine's day this saturday! hee.how happening could that be.planning to date out at marina.hee.well,you know the nice view of the singapore river.what's better than that as compared to 'lepaking' at either lakeside or cck? hahs. i'm so looking forward to saturday baby!!

BB's Birthday celebration!

2009-02-03T21:13:00.004+08:00

Bb's Birthday present;

A G-Shock Watch.

hahs.yay! finally all my plans were fulfilled.ouh yeah.i managed to make bb's birthday a memorable one!

so at around 6pm, i met bb at jurong east mrt and we headed straight to IMM. Bb was seriously clueless where we're heading to and he kept on asking me "Bi,u nak g mana nie??". hahs.so yeah.when we reached IMM, i was looking for Swensen's but yet i couldnt find it. Hence, i brought Bb round and round IMM to find Swensen's. Bb was so so irritating cause he was continuously bombarding questions at me. haha.

so when i finally found Swensen's, bb was startled. yeah.he didnt expect me to bring him to Swensen's luhh. so i pulled bb in and there we sat, looking at the menu. Bb was so uneasy at first cause he was seriously particular about the cost of the food.say it's Swensens so the prices are quite xpensive i shall say. without further ado,i ordered a regular Earthquake ice-cream.hahs.i loved the look on bb's face.he was like, "asal u bawak i gi sini?? kalau i tau, i taknak ikut u sehh!".

Bb's Second Birthday Surprise.

after the ice-cream arrived, i slowly took out the pressie.bb was like looking at the paper bag,curiously then looking into it.he got all shocked when he saw the G-Shock box.hahs.then he frantically opened the box and how surprised he was when he looked at the watch! "Bi!!Omg! I tak pernah sehh dapat present macam gini". all i did was to giggle and smile.

done with eating already.so yeah.after the Swensen's thingy, i sent bb home luhh.hee.

well.i shall say that in total,bb had 3 surprises.(the last one couldnt be mentioned though.its an inside thingy.hahs.) i was seriouslyy very very happy that i could make boyfriend had his time of his life.he was esctatic i suppose.ouh bb,i love you so much.promise is kept;i won't leave you no matter what hapens alright??

BIRTHDAY BOY!!!

2009-02-03T00:13:00.002+08:00

Happy 9Teen'th Birthday Bb!

Old Old!

yeah.hahs.it marks the 3rd of February and it's so going to be Bb's birthday.aww.someone's 9Teen already!hahs.

i can't wait to meet bb later,awaiting the excitement and the smile that will be drawn on his lips.aww.i'm sure and i hope he'll like what i've planned for him.though it's simple,i hope it'll be etched forever as the sweetest memory ever.*winks.

well.in the conversation i had with bb yesterday,i told him to have a new resolution which is to QUIT SMOKING!! hahs.well,bb started back when he was supposed to quit.naughty bb.hee.

my wishes for him?hahs.well.it's all written in the text i gave him at midnight just now;

Happy Birthday Sayangg!

You are very special and you deserve the best.

Wish you a wonderful life filled with love and happiness.

Hope others bring you joy,just as you've brought joy to me.

Love you alot baby!

Bb dah 9teen already!

Old Old!

COUNTING DOWN TO BABY'S BIRTHDAY.

2009-02-02T17:43:00.004+08:00

Counting down to Baby's Birthday!

Coming 19 already!

Old Old!

walla! hahs.well.tommorow's going to be bb's birthday.ouh well.he's plainly very excited to turn 9teen.hahs.i was like having a commotion saying that it'll be his last year of his teenager life i shall say cause the following year he's gonna be 20!! hahs.Old Old bb! he's gonna be an adult soon.so i planned things last minute which was just yesterday.thinking about where to celebrate his birthday and what i;m going to buy for his pressie.hahs.but yeah! hahs.i just bought him something. *pfft* its very very expensive.but sure thing,i hope he's gonna like it plus together with the plan tommorow!! i can't wait to see him smileee. =)

so yeah.today was alright.the afternoon spend chatting with bb.hahs.he's sadistic and funny as ever.but hell yeah, i love boyfriend!

so yeah.we chatted.hahs!

bb sent me this peekture and i loveee it! bb cutee luhh!

moments after,bb asked me to watch Green Street Hooligans. it was a NZ based movie.hahs.im lovin the slang.it goes like."aye mate!".hahs.and as a result,i was hooked-up on the main actor in the movie which was Elijah Wood. aww.he is cutee! bb got 'jealous' but didnt want to admit! hahas.he was all green-eyed already just now.

hee.Elijah Wood!!!

CNY 2009

2009-01-23T22:23:00.005+08:00

Dee, Rico, Farah.

yay! finally weekend has arrived.yeah2.cant wait to have a mayjah chillout at the downtown east chalet from saturday till tuesday.teehee.

early in the morning i woke up in a hurry,doll myself up and meet up farah GF and the guys at wdls.we were all going back to school for the CNY Celebration.Well.it was fun luhh.Cedric,Amirul,Saifudeen,Vinod,Kinson & Farhan went along with Farah and me.hahs.it was so 'kecoh' luhh.ced's main 'aim' was to eat our all time fav Nasi Padang.haha.wth.along the way,i saw wan too.didnt expect him to turn out at school too,because of the lion dance troop of course.

so after we chilled out at school,farah and me met up faris BF.the three of us headed to Yishun to buy Dora's Birthday Party stuff.hahs.it was fun.farah went searching for her Korean VCD as per usual.so after we bought all the stuff needed,we headed makan2 at farah's crib.and yet again,i miss farah's momma's cooking.hahs.we ate fried mee.it was delicious luhh.went to a second serving indeed.faris?haha.dont know how many servings he took.

after the meal,i couldnt catch up with GFS to dora's suprise birthday party.cause i had plans to meet up sayang.so yeah,rushing for time i took a cab and headed there.as per usual,sayang was blabbering about MONEY spent on the taxi fare.hahs.at first our 'date' was kind of mundane cause sayang was too engrossed in his pokemon game and i was far far away in lalaland,particularly so 'senyap' again.haha.but yeah.as time pass by and when sayang had to go to meet Ab, we both dont wanna let ourselves go.yeah.everytime we meet it'll always be for a while.and sayang said it was also a last minute plan to go to mimie's pit.we hugged like there;s no tomorow.hahs.well i still remember what sayang said;

sorry tau bi i tak lama jumpa u.u take care kay sayang,pape msg tau jgn tak msg..i rindu sangat2 tau dengan u..

hee.so yeah.that was some excerpt of what he said.not exact luhh.hee.but sayang was non-stop hugging and kissing me luhh sehh.awwww.that was so sweet.am going to miss you sayang!! will be meeting you on friday ouhkay! we make up for today!!

i so love, love, love you luhh Md Farhan!!!

Dee Feat Rico

Dee & Farah GF

2009-01-22T13:05:00.003+08:00

im on hiatus.

saturday-tuesday.

finally,the weekends are drawing near.and yes,in conjuction with the chinese new year hols,three families or four families,i shall say are going to rock the costa sands resort at pasir ris! hahs.yeah.i hope it'll gonna be fun.i am sure going to dive in the pool,soak myself in the sun and let my hair down.sure thing,i am going to importantly lease out the tension i have for the period of time.the beach would be the perfect spot.

yesterday night,manja called me.hmm.well,he mentioned that i was being different.actually at first i was a little mad cause he didnt replied my sms.barely cause he didnt tell me he was going to hang out with his friends under the block or 'lepak' i shall say.hmm.i didnt know why u reacted that way.he asked for my permission even whether he could overnight at mimie's pit or something on friday.he didnt want me to feel 'one kind' or whatsover.so i just gave him a suttle answer "up to u luhh.u yang nak pergi.sukati luhh". i dont know what is wring with me. i think what eem said was true."you guys are so long together.tak kan tkder perasaan jealous or mcm ragu2 dgn each other kan.sekarang semua mesti up luhh sis".

im so over thoughtful about things.haish.i cant say much cause barely im already diagnosed with two kinds of sickness.well.the doctor advised not to be stressful or too tension about things.so yeah,i cant follow much in my feelings or instincts as well.it sucks seriously.

n btw,22 january 2009.my two lovables' birthdays has arrived!!

Happy Birthday to dearest sis,Siti NurFarhanah & Edora Darla!!! May whatever you do in future will be successful and may god bless you two!!

ANGEL

2009-01-16T14:29:00.002+08:00

This song is dedicated entirely to dearest Boo.
A.N.G.E.L

a.n.g.e.l

Just like a shadowI'll be beside you

I'll be your comfort

And let it guide you home

I will provide you a place of shelter

I want a be your zone

Tell me what you wanted me to do

I'll make you great to be a man

With a woman who can stand

Who will never promise to leave her man

Making vows to please her man

If I could be your angel

Your angel, Your angel

Protect you from the pain
I'll keep you safe from danger

You'll never hurt again

I'll be your a.n.g.e.l

I'm gona be your a.n.g.e.l

I'll be your angel

Just like the moon

I'll step beside

And let your sun shine

While I follow behind

Cause baby what ya got

It is with all the props

With everything I'm not

Tell me what to do

Tell me what you wanted me to do

I'll make you great to be a man

With a woman who can stand

Who will never promise to leave her man

Making vows to please her man

If I could be your angel

Your angel, Your angel

Protect you from the pain

I'll keep you safe from danger

You'll never hurt again

I'll be your a.n.g.e.l

I'm gona be your a.n.g.e.l

I'll be your angel

Tell me why there's so many good men

And the world's misunderstood

He's a dog, he's no good

I wish somebody would

Disrespect my man

You're gona have to come see me

I go hard for my baby

He's all that I need

So if you got a good one

Put your hands up

Come on girl and stand up

Go ahead lift your man up

Get up

If you got a good one, put your hands up

Go ahead lift your man up

Get up

If you got a good one, stand up

Come on girl, and stand up

If I could be your angel

Your angel, Your angel

Protect you from the pain

I'll keep you safe from danger

You'll never hurt again

I'll be your a.n.g.e.l

I'm gona be your a.n.g.e.l

I'll be your angel

collage

2009-01-12T00:42:00.003+08:00

those times we've been through.

it's our seventh month,manja.

finally.the day has arrived.we had a casual meet though.went down to manja's crib.we spend our day watching tv,white chicks to be exact.hahs.funny funny.manja was so sick,yeah due to his efforts in quitting smoking.you can do it baby!! those are the nasty side effects in the process of quitting.so yeah,then we went down to buy late lunch and bla bla bla.haha.but,it was great luh.at least we had fun together.i just love you so much luh manja.no one can ever replace u hunn.ure just the one and only.insyallah,we'll definitely last!

so now im blogging due to the fact that i personally cant sleep.not sleep-deprived but im washed upon utmost anticipation,so nervous about the results.insyallah,i;ll do great.manja would be the first to know!

7thmonthsary

2009-01-10T23:11:00.002+08:00

Happy 7thmonthsary baby!!

I Love You So Much!

yay!finally3,the day has come.tomorrow will be our 7thmonthsary baby! hahs.it seems we are getting closer to a year soon!!! im so happy for us baby!!hope we can last forever,till we both say 'i do'. =)

just now spend my whole day at auntie esah's house.well,her son,abg din had their wedding today.went there quite early in the morning though cause granny thought we could catch up to follow the rest to see the akad nikah at the bride's house.indeed,they are both good looking and perfect for each other.hope your marriage last till eternity!

at first i thought the whole reception would be boring cause im not that close to auntie midah's grand daughters.but,when kak ogy came with aunt saadiah,it was fun.hahs.got someone to talk to at least luhh.the funniest part was to come up with a pantun (last minute one) to kind of greet the guests upon the arrival of the couple.

dua tiga kucing berlari

mana nak sama si kucing belang

penat sudah kami menanti

tiba sudah pengantin kita

im waiting in utmost anticipation for the o level results this coming monday and im sure going to spray my hair jet black.the important thing is to refrain myself in getting shooed back home.hahs.praying hard for the best results.=)

once again,to my dearest boo,md farhan,HAPPY 7THMONTHSARY BABY!!!

I LOVE YOU

I LOVE YOU.

you're just irreplacable manja.

school.soccer.heartbreak.

2009-01-07T14:34:00.003+08:00

heartbreak.

well.yesterday as per usual i went to school to help out in the orientation.it was fun.jerman exchanged with watie to do the charades.jerman,fizah & me were kind of gossiping about something.hahs.it was fun.

later in the afternoon,watie & me dropped by at soccer and helped out in the soccer trial.i felt as though it's been ages i kicked a ball.hahs.anyways,there were a few good talents discovered and indeed,it was great to know that soccer was their first cca choice.this year,girls soccer has been recognised as a cca.gosh.how good is that.in our times before,it's not recognised yet and we had to be in another cca to get our points.but no matter what,all the best to WDL's Girls Soccer!!

went back,checked my mails.mimie left me a msg in friendster,asking me to read up her bloggy.well,yeah.it was about the incident sayang told me about.i do agree sometimes that girls have PMS when they are having their time of the month.so yeah,happy enough she was already in good terms with them.=)

i wasnt really well last night as sayang and i had a tiff.gosh.i was so depressed in the situation.how could he simply put it that i didnt bother about it.i did updated him but why this? i really didnt know what to do.felt like even commting suicide.believe it or not,i took pills,which was alot,around 20 of them.i i'd wake up the next day,i will.if i couldnt,then i wont.i put it all to fate.but in god's will,i just experienced a very heavy effect after consuming them.i managed to wake up today.this morning sayang texted me,he sounded ouhkay,but yet,i just could not understand.to him,ive been hurting him and i do things that you know will kind of spoil the relationship.but as for me,maybe i just couldnt realise that.gosh.my mind's really in a mess.

tired.fun>retail therapy.

2009-01-05T22:33:00.003+08:00

DC.

well.woke up at 5.45 am in the morning.gosh.that was hard.i have always wake up near afternoon every single day.however,i kind of called up by the Student Councillor Board to help out with the sec one orientation.so yeah,a few of us went for it.

the orientation was quite fun.eventhough it was just amazing race the whole day,it was really fun doing the charade with watie and fieza.before breaktime,it was kind of slack cause most groups didnt went up but after break it was a lil more engaging.nasi padang was awesome as usual.hahs.jerman was non-stop emphasising on his 'nasi babi'.irritating oi! hahs.the whole orientation kind of end with a bang.why? cause we had this WDL mass dance together with the sec 1's and the SC.the alumnis was so engaged in the dance.psst.and that eurasian song; bak kut teh or _______?? hahs.only we know luhh eyy.at least i burnt up energy during the dance.

after getting home,pak long's daughter,my along yan called up and told me to meet up.as per usual,retail therapy.at least i had bling2 with me so yeah,i could splurge it well.hahs.

sayang is on his way in quitting smoking already.yeah! that's the way baby!at least he ceased smoking bit by bit.insyallah,you sure can do it sayang.jiayou!!!!!

*BABY,MISS YOU!!

birthday presents: Sony vaio lappy & an Acer notebook.

from daddy lovee!

sleepy sunday!

2009-01-04T23:00:00.003+08:00

huarrghh!

3 hours of sleep i could simply get.

yes,yes and yes.i am definitely so dead tired barely because i only did receive 3 hours of beauty sleep.gosh.well,yesterday i couldnt get to bed.it was as though i was high on caffeine.so spend the morning chatting with my crappy crappy bestie,fandi and also mimie.as per usual that fandi is always so so irritating.later that morning mimie & i was kind of irritated about the blog template.we simply couldnt get things solved for her bloggy and finally,we called it a day.hahs.sayang on the other hand has already dozed off to lalaland,particularly tired ;exhausted from schooling and stuff.

at 9 am sharp,granny woke me up and yeah,i had to get ready for my shopping trip.hahs.i was like a zombie,walking around getting ready.hahs.

when sayang woke up,he texted in and told me he was sick.gosh.worried i was of his condition.but yah,i was elated to know that sayang wanted to quit smoking.and yeah,i would give him my full support.in god's will,his health will get better once he's stop being addictive to nicotine.it;s also good for his future.yah,at least he wont end up being sick or so.anyway,smoking is bad for health.hahs.wth.

for sure and as always,im starting to miss sayang already.haha.yeah2.rarely we could meet up and talk crap together due to him schooling and stuff.so yah.once we meet up,how i'd wished we could remain in that way.=)

BABY,I MISS YOU!!

sunny saturday!

2009-01-04T00:37:00.004+08:00

cute3?

hahs.our 4thmonthsary baby.

now, we're coming 7 mths old.

well.today i was supposed to meet up daddy to get my another personal pc,which is my notebook.gosh.now i have two lappies with me considering!hahs.im like a rich bitch if u would call it!

after meeting daddy,i went straight to sayang's crib.well yeah,he invited me the previous night though.so yeah,headed down to his crib and met with his whole family i shall say.so today i met kak lin and family.ate mee rebus too! it was superb.hahs.sayang was totally obsessed with his new pet,mat n minah,which is a pair of tortoise of the opposite sex.he even modified its tank with a styrofoam to create a some kind of slope i shall say.funny luhh.we spend the day chilling out,watching dvd.great family time together at sayang's crib.

tomorrow,made plans to go jalan2 cari makan at johor with my family.weehee! its gonna be fun cause im getting another 100 bucks to change and shopppp!!!!!

HELLO 2009!!

2009-01-01T00:29:00.002+08:00

BYE 2008, HELLO 2009!!

yay! welcome2 to a new new year! well.2008 had really brought me the sweetest memories and also the not so sweet memories.hahs.basically it thought me lots of things.in addition,changes me into a very wise,independent and a much matured girl. with the new year ahead of me, i did plan a full list of goals to be reached in 2009! yeah. at least i know what im doing right?cause im the type who really doesnt know how to stick with the plan.so now,im ensuring that i will.with the help of my close ones n esp sayang of course.

as usual,ever year i really dont celebrate countdowns.the reason is,im just not used to all those hectic and crazy atmosphere of those people as of like there's no tomorrow.hahs.so,woke up nearly at 5 plus in the morning,basically my sickness struck me again.later in the morning went to the clinic.went shopping for nana's school stuff as well later in the evening.

sayang just bought a pair of turtles i shall say.hahs.now he's so into it.keeping pets and naming it mat & minah since the pair is of the opposite sex.sayang too didnt went for countdown.literally tired,friends didnt called in. so,he called me later at night.hahs.i really miss him though.a lot.alot. hope today i could meet him if we both are free.=)

new year,new resolutions.

relationship.family.wedding.

2008-12-29T18:46:00.003+08:00

farhan & fadilah

symbol of our everlasting relationship

finally got back from my relative's wedding.well.it was held in johor so today i had to wake up earlier than usual,hahs,at 10+ am,to get ready for the event.halfway there i caught headache.dang.that was sure due to not having breakfast early in the morning.

sadly,i couldnt make it in meeting sayangku to visit his brother in hospital.it was kind of abrupt.i thought in the first place i could accompany him but indeed i was told in the last minute.so,i couldnt.\

yesterday night,i had a serious conversation with granny.neither it was kind of threatening nor harsh but indeed we talked about my relationship with sayang.what i was told is that,coming 2009,a new year,i had to be open about things in order to cease away those misleading thoughts which momma had against me about my realtionship.at first,it was hard for me to be honest.but then,thinking about it,i guess i really had to cause like what granny had said,she knew both of us are really into each other and definitely this relatoinship is sure going a long way ahead.yeah.i knew too.i guess i had to cause i dont want all these negative thoughts engulf momma especially,making her hate this realtionship even more.so for now,granny's meeting sayang to kinda know him better and maybe give us some advice.=)

new year's coming up in a few days time.nah.n again NO countdowns for me.why? yeah.it sounds weird and very whatever to some probably.but seriously,im againsr countdowns.partying till like there;s no tomorrow,dancing your booties and having fun till you're not concious; all these are just for nothing.well.planning your 2009 goals and reflecting your life in 2008 is sure much more appealing i shall say.i rather have a decent celebration;hanging out with friends and chilling.that'll be nice.

STANWYCK'S BACK!!

2008-12-28T22:25:00.003+08:00

HAPPY 16th BIRTHDAY!

yeah! im finally back in bussiness ya'll! hahs.well.after O's i kinda get busy looking for work but,in the end i quitted my job.now back finding job.wth.so,its been a long time i didnt blog.the reason was,momma took away my lappy and finally daddy bought me a new lappy! SONY VAIO.hahs.the one i wanted so much!

so yeah,my birthday was finally over and i am finally sixteen! weehee! so yeah.i got a surprise birthday party from faris bestie and my sayang,Farhan.LOVE YOU GUYS!!!

six months together and now we;re almost seven months old! yeah baybeh!! i love you so much md farhan!!! those challebges we've faced thru together,we've aced them all.insyallah,we will stay strong together. Md Farhan is mine aite. You Girls Keep your HANDS OFF MY BOO! hahaahah!!

so yeah.gtg for now.will be updating more soon! stay in touch yaw!!!

BIG LOVES,

KAPRAT OWN'S.

2008-09-20T14:31:00.002+08:00

hey guys!!

im going to be on hiatus for this period of time till the 13th of November.

basically im extremely downtrodden with revisions for the major O-Levels Examinations.

fasting,too,in this month is merely like facing challenges all along.

i hope raya will at least be fulfilling.

although im not that excited and looking forward for it.

O-levels are hell more imporant than anything else!!

so,catch u people as soon as everything has ended and basically when im free.

LOVES,DEE.

2008-08-31T20:17:00.005+08:00

syggku.aku sungguh mencintaimu dirimu.

81 hari telah berlalu.

Jet'aime Farhan.

yeah2.what the hell.i wouldnt go about speaking in malay in blogging.so weird kan dora? hahs.yeah.today marked 31 august 2008.its malaysia's birthday btw.happy birthday neighbour! today i had the most exciting yet fun time ever.gosh.it's maybe the same,meeting syggku but today its kinda different for me.

met syggku at woodlands today.we went belt-hunting because syggku's pants was like so longgar,anytime can tercabut.kesian dier.lucky i didnt pull it.if not,habis! GAME OVER. we went makan at LJS.i teman sygg onlyy.i didnt eat,hee.PMS i shall say.so not in the mood to indulge in food.sweet was it.syggku fed me.haha!! mcm tk biase onlyy.met wardah n her friend at LJS too.she was so different.hahs.in the sense she got prettier.congrats wardah fer geting 2(D) for your malay O levels!! hahas.

after mkn time,i teman syggku to his uncle's house to get his safety boots.it was at boon lay,NTI.well.i was kind of malu cuz its the first time so called meeting his family member or so.at least u;ve met my daddy n mummy sygg.i haven met ur parents still ouhkayy.so not fair.but nvm,im like 'menggigil' if u were to bring me to them.

after that,syggku sent me home.sweet.leant on him all the way to CCK.turon and just merely talk crap under the block.funny.i got spanked on my butt countless times.sygg so naughty!

well.the magical moment came by when im going back.syggku gave two pecks on the cheeks and so unexpectedly he gave me another peck on the lips.sygg!! i was so touched ouhkayy.u remembered my so called wish.n yeah.its granted!!! sweett!!!

barely i know why i felt this way.maybe because sygg is going for attachment for like two mths++ and then im getting busy with O's.we have to sacrifice our relationship for a while.yeah.maybe a break or so.i think its our dugaan in this fasting month.well.i planned to do some 'ibadah' this month.cleanse and ease myself for the least.n you too sygg.go for terawih prayers ouhkayy.im going taw.=)

sygg3!! im gonna miss that kiss u gave me.hahs!! sweet indulgence! it was mushy-mushy marshmellow.hee.

P/S: YOU'LL ALWAYS BE IN MY HEART. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.SYGGG YOU!

2008-08-30T18:56:00.008+08:00

Chill Out Session At KTV with GFs.

80th day together syggku & im still counting the days.

i love you so.

yesterday morning i was awaken by my granny's call,saying faris was here.it was 8.30 in the morning.well.skipped school cuz i was far too shagged for teacher's day.pure lazyness to take part in the 1.2 km walk.hahs.Gfs said the day was fun.so,i accompanied faris to alexandra for his eye checkup.at about 12 we were done,went for lunch at the cafeteria nearby and headed straight to somerset to meet up farah and dora sygg for out ktv session.excited i was to sing and make singapore rain.but indeed,my voice wasnt that bad cuz it didnt rain afterall.yar,like for real,hahs.it was pure crazyness and it was really exciting! we were all 'high' on food,dancing & singing.funny it was.but it could be much more fun if fizah sygg was around.maybe next time in future.looking forward to that.

well.finally our relationship is getting better day after day.i kind of opened up and told him what i really felt about things.basically what i hated and got myself pissed of bigtime because of it.yeah.like i once mentioned,we are like from two different worlds and it doesnt mean i have to accept everything around him as well.i love him,yes i do.but not some other things that are around him.thats my point.i cant adapt to face reality.i hope we can live our lives together without any other obstructions to it.im not up to face all those.i cant change my perceptions about things sygg.i hope you understand.i didnt mean to be mean to you or be unfair to you.but really,i just cant.

*More pictures have been uploaded at friendster.=)

2008-08-28T14:28:00.002+08:00

if i could count the number of times i said "i love you" to you, i think it all could be compliled in a book thicker than this.

78th day together syggku.

im loving you like there's no tomorrow.

finally! im over the preliminaries fever.gosh.papers were fcuking hard i should say.yeah.it was made harder than the standard o levels paper.its ouhkay.barely did my best for all the papers.i'm on hiatus right now.i need a goddamn break!

i'm well off after all this while of tiffs.hahs.yeah.finally,sygg n i built some communication gap between us.man.we're far more pleased with the condition right now.no more tiffs,even the slightest ones.i learnt to be more compromised in doing things,the way i react and be myself.thats more like it.for me,nothing is lacking.its only time;we;re both busy with work and school.no ample time together.but we dont miss out much.always contactible.=) 2 months alreadyy.looking forward to our third.

well.now basically im networking.doing more than ever.yeah.prelims is the barrier for all this.now i can blog n stuff.coolshits.if not,lappy is the may-jah distraction of all!-right dora?

tomorrow im gonna skip school.its just teacher's day.planning to accompany faris dear to alexandra hosp for his checkup then late afternoon i'm meeting gurlfees and the five of us are going to shake our booties yaw! hahs.we planned to hit town and sing our heartts out at K-box.well.if it's confirmed,please bring ur umbrellas cuz im bringing some rain to our little sunny island! =)

on hiatus

2008-08-16T15:47:00.001+08:00

hey guys!!

i won't be updating my blog for this period of time.

been busy mugging for the upcoming prelim exams.

will be back again as soon as i'm done with exams!!!

far too happy for words!

2008-08-12T17:51:00.002+08:00

62 days together syggku.

happy twomonthsary yesterday!!!

hahs!gosh.this few days i've been like so on top of the world!!! yeah2.today supposedly i am getting my results for my malay o level results.dang.i was like sick in the stomach during history lesson ,half an hour before the release of results.adrenaline was rushing through.hearts pumping fast.we were all too nervous for the results.as soon as we were all release i ran down straight to the foyer to check it out.frantically screaming with tears of joy,i was far too speechless for the results.expectations were met.to be exact,i attained my A1 for real.syygku was the first person i told my results,followed by momma and daddy.they were so friggin happy for me.I LOVE YOU PEOPLE FOR ALL THE SUPPORT.

yesterday was my second monthsary.yeah.planned out to chill out with syggku so i dropped by at lakeside to meet him.hahs.nearly half an hour we were sitting like two belos at the mrt station,thinking of where the hell we are heading to.finally,jurong point was decided.walked around,gave him a small treat and then met his two friends and we headed to imm straight.it was like crazzy being with them.hahs.esp giler.he was freaking crazy! at around 8plus i headed home.flagged a cab and i passed syggku his monthsary gift.hahs.im glad he liked it though.something simple.something that can be worn to keep him reminded of me.hee!

coolshit.now im practically much2 more motivated in revising for all the core subjects!! hahs.with all these people by my side (credits to:parents,family members,syggku,friend,abg bonzer),im gearing up for the preparations for prelims and O's!!!

funny.funny.funny.

2008-08-10T14:04:00.002+08:00

hahs.yesterday when i was chilling with shad watching tv,syggku texted me.

this was what the conversation was like:

syggku : wokie dear..i nw with kak zie..AKU BUTO SAMA KAMU...

dee : huh? wad did u say?

syggku : SAYA BUTO SAMA KAMU..mean in indonesia..i need u..

dee : U! Dats butuh not buto! Omg.i tot u maki me.gosh!!

hahs! i was hysterically laughing our hearts out with shad.panicked was i thinking syggku was like fcukin mad at me or what.hahs.next time syggku dont do this again eyy.funny!

pathetic he shall say.

2008-08-10T10:16:00.003+08:00

people colour my world.they make me complete.

1 more day to our 2ndMonthsary syggku.

practically woke up at around 7.25 because i was awaken by syggku's sms.as per normal syggku told me he was going off to work.gosh,i hoope he feels alright after what had happened last night.i mean,people shouldnt be doing that to him.i hope he would settle things in a good way or so.

well.i slept at 5 in the morning just now.hahs.well.basically talking on the phone with Alai.coincidentally we met in msn and then we kind of chatted.crap.crap.crap. i shall say when we are in total boredom.hahs.it's been quite a while since we've talked.n he called me PATHETIC just because i turned up for school on friday when it's not even half-day.practically only 2 hours of watching the parade n concert.waste time,waste energy,waste money.lagi aper yg wasted?irritating luhs kamu.so yah.happy to hear from him after a long2 time of pure avoidance and hostility.hahs.

weeheee! i cant wait for tomorrow! its going to be my 2ndMonthsary!!! hahs.well i hope we could meet up tomorrow since its holiday too.i want to spend time with dearest syggku!! i love him so much!!

chill out.

2008-08-09T22:13:00.004+08:00

national day was spend chilling out at home.shad came along.watched the parade.hahs.i thought it would practically rain and the parade would be like cancelled.hahs.i was wrong indeed.national day went fine!

moment of anticipation.

2008-08-09T12:20:00.003+08:00

59th days together & i'm still counting the days.

i love you syggku,farhan!

finally! i got some extra space to spend on myslelf this holidays.gosh.ive been working out a little to much i guess.prelims is just a week more.its coming!! dang.

thursday night i accompanied faris dear to mr hendri fiancee's place,kak shifaa, to get her henna done for her nikah on 080808.cool date huh? auspicious i shall say.well.the night was fun.met up wif aan sygg cuz he showed us how to get there as her place was kind of near his.boon lay was like full of that 'friends' of his! haha.kidding sygg.well.we boarded the bus and then we got down.but gosh.we got down at the wrong place and we had to made our way roundabout.i was practically lost and it was raining so heavily dat night.i owed syggku bigtime.he sacrificed himself in the rain just to searched for the block himself and yah,getting us umbrellas from his friend's place just because he doesnt want us to get wet.oh my god.i was so2 touched at heart.moreover,because of us he was down sick that night.sygg3.i really owe u bigtime.

yesterday we made our way to jurong again for mr hendri's nikah.faris had to touch up kak shifaa's henna cuz the color was a lil light.gosh.kak shifaa was SO gorgeous!!!!! lucky mr hendri huh.congrats3 on their official wedding.btw.yesterday too i we were suppose to meet syggku cuz he wanted to kind of sent us there.but complications arose.that botch accused me that i did things behind her back.hey3.i DIDNT haf time to steal away your property ouhkayy.i have a boyfriend myself.what i wanted to do was to help both of u but u didnt appreciate that.BITCH.all because of that i didnt went up to syggku.gosh.i was felt totally bad luhs.lucky he understood me.i owe u another one syggku.

today i planned to chill out with sygggku but too bad he couldnt make it.but im waiting to yah,our 2nd monthsary to celebrate with you sygg!! hahs! so.i guess today i'll sit at home and chill,watching the parade and fireworks on tv.

yesterday after the wedding i texted syggku:

dee: syggku! im now going back,wating for the bus.waa.best nyer i tgk dorg kawin!!! biler agknyer kiter nyer turn ey?? hee! (this was what i told him literally)
syggku:ohk..i nw inside the bus ni..g j.e ferz..2 met ab n ct kt sane..ahak3.insyalah..1 day k syg. nk 11 anak ehk?? keke..byk tol..
dee : hahs!! wow!! satu team bola seyy sygg!!

haha.funny2.i was practically joking when i said i wanted when he asked me how many kids i wanted.in the end it dragged on.hahs!!!

P.S: may u both live happily ever after!! congrats!! & happy birthday Singapore!!

nutheads.

2008-08-04T18:16:00.005+08:00

obsession.

our 54th dayy syggku & the days are drawing near to our 2nd.

school was bloddy hell crazyy today.hahs.i had truckloads of crazyy funtime with gurlfees yaw.we all still did disturb farah dear of the kiss-kiss incident.hahs.well.i hope sooner or later they 'both' will reunite.in god's will.after school was hilarious.i skipped physics literally and went down to the canteen and met up with dora dear,fizah dear and faris dear.as i say,our loudhailers practically drew attention of the other school mates who were around.fizah dear got kind of caught up in some personal yet a very extreme complicated problem.however,just move on girlfriend! ignore all tis crap.niwaez,revenge isnt the end.u just move on with life.O levels is just 75 days more(as what dora dear had counted.man.she is really making me freak out.haha.its drawing near!!)

then after lesson was english remedial.we had a test.dang.it was difficult.but the three of us practically went nuts everytime mdm shobs went out of class.what else??!!! camwhoring!!! hahs! scroll down later to view the pictures.it tells a thousand words yaw.

today farhan sygg went for his medical checkup for NS.hee.man.he said the doctor kind of misplaced the needle two times and finally he took 3 bottles of his blood.gosh.and worst of all.yeah.he was practically 'exposed'.hahs! shame2 youh! now waiting for him to wake up.he's snoring at home by the way.wake up boyfee!! its almost maghrib sygg!!!

im waiting for the weekends!!! 6 more days and it'll be our 2nd-monthsary!! weehee.i cant barely wait for that.i hope things shall work out well as planned! i love you!

smiles.=)

2008-08-03T14:26:00.004+08:00

the collage on the wall.

53rd day together syggku.

spend the night yesterday revamping my room to be a whole new me.gather the whole lot of the Germany Trip's peektures and i place it all on my wall.that new collage really made all those memories alive.hahs.i miss Germany yaw! but i prefer Singapore better.in god's will.one day let me migrate there.=)

i started my day today by doing all those revisions.Biology is my first.still not done yet.gosh.17 more days to the prelims.mug! mug! mug! i haf to do my best before the real O's.

finally met Dora Jade online.its been a while we talked.linked me alreadyy rite GF? link u too,soon yaw!!

yesh3! farhan sygg just topped up his prepaid.finally my fingers get to exercise again.hahs.i mish u luhs gendeng! tomorrow i got to remind him about his medical checkup fer NS.it'll be his turn next year.serving the nation fer two years.hahs.he'll me my botak jones soon! hee! sygg3 u!

faris dear dropped by my crib yesterday.yeah.eat3 again.nasi lemak was on the menu yaw.then he accompanied me to Lot 1 to but a gift.hahs.yeah3.for who? i'll tell u peeps as soon as the day arrived,after i gave the gift to that sumone.hahs.

fitness was awesome but tiring.yeah.got to push the extra limits and shed off those extra pounds yaw.hahs.

nizam dear was being irritating.hahs.yeah.today joe dear was asking me out to town.as per normal.chill out with my dearest friends.hahs.miss them truckloads luh.once again,i forgot to return nizam dear his bag.his getting mad at me.hahs.nah.wawa dear will pass him my contact number today.i love you luhs bitch.

yesterday night i got a call from pieka.then soon ejal dear.he's letting out his 1001 problems to me.yeah.the same old bloody problem about him and teesha.haish.i dont noe when can they both stay in peace. hey boyfriend,relax ouhkayy? if she's the one for you,then she is.if fate dont turn as it is,just move on.we are all there for you.=)

rinduness let go.sadiscism overwhelmed CITS.

2008-08-01T19:34:00.009+08:00

Stanwyck's Love's
It's our 51st Day together syggku.ILY!!!

today is friday.as per usual.i was slacking in class and gettin my lazy arse stuck onto the chair during lessons and sleeping at 'intervals'.hahs!i was just too tired i guess.yeah.i DID had tons of good night's sleep but like what my gurlfees said,its because i didnt get much rest before all this while.so its accumulating right now.

today me & farah dear was looking forward till the lessons end.yeah3.we're both having the best of both worlds yaw.we're both meeting special2 people.hahs! we had 'kupu-kupu in the perut' during chemistry and was waiting for the clock to tick fast.then both of us was like sakit perut because of the over excitement.funny us.

rushing out of the school gate,saw farhan sygg sitting down at the opposite stop.he was practically 'smart' today.hahs.based on the specs he was wearing just now.yeah2.it does suit him.syggku looked like a very good boy today.& so finally! after one week of not seeing each other,i finally got to let out my rinduness for him.awwww.i miss him babiloads! hahs.spend the day sitting with each other,talking about us & loads of stuffs.i cant help smiling inside my heart.im too happy for words.

well.this season's 'hotstuff' was actually the geekiness faris dear spread to all of us.with the big,black-rimmed,'obit' specs,we ALL practically looked like educated geeks.hahs! take a look at the peektures then peeps!

turnover for me,i guess.

2008-07-30T17:45:00.004+08:00

Siti Love Farhan

49th day together & i'm still counting the days.

moody.moody.moody.what the hell is wrong with me? am not the usual self today.things just dont feel right.moreover,3 teachers called up to me so called and asked me what happen.yeah.i dont even understand why siti is changing.i mean.looking at myself even,it kind of turns me off.i was hoping to joke around as per normal with my mates but i was lip-locked.gosh.i want the old me.well.literally i sat down and reflected on what i've done.finally,i got the answer.its the stress i got from my studies.yeah.im too overworked.sometimes till i got to burn the midnight oil.and when i dont get enough rest and becomes very3 sleepy,i just dont feel like turning up.that IS my freakin problem.i think i need to manage time well.yeah,maybe dont get too overworked and fucked up with studies.i need to study smart.sorry girlfriends for today!

dearestt boo;this is for you.=)

2008-07-29T18:43:00.003+08:00

I been sitting here so long

Thinkin how this came to be

Don’t know if it’s right or wrong

Cos you’re the closest friend to me

You’re the one that I would call

When I needed somebody there

I know it makes no sense

But would you understand

If I say that I love you

If I told you what’s the deal

If I say that I love you

Tell me how you feel

If I say that I love you

Would you like at me the same

Cos I don’t know wanna throw it all away

If I say that I love you

Tell me how you feel

If I say that I love you

Throw it all away

Baby I can’t look into your eyes

Cos Im scared that you might see

What I feel inside

What you really mean to me

And baby I can’t run away

So I really need to know

Need to know

If I say that I love you

Tell me how you feel

If I say that I love you

Throw it all away

Ramzi Feat Ash King- If I say

answered with full integrity.=)

2008-07-29T18:07:00.003+08:00

*this survey was forwarded by my cuzzie so yah.answered fully with full integrity ouhkayys?

1)If your lover betrayed you,what will your reaction be?
*Im practically speechless but i know Aan Sygg will not do that to me.
2)If you can hav a dream to come true,what will it be?
*becoming a certified psychologist,married to the man i love & giving luxury to my familyy.
3)What till your dream wedding be like?
*Balinese concept yaw.
4)What will you do with a billon dollars?
*save it partly.give it to momma and granny.spend it on myself & dearestt boo.
5)What is your ideal lover be like?
*no more an ideal lover.he's mine alreadyy.
6)Which is more blessed,loving someone or being loved by someone?
*being loved by him.
7)How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
*as long as i live.
8)If the person you secretly like is attached ,what would you do?
*hee.as i mentioned earlier,MD FARHAN is mine already.
9)Is thatanything have made you sad these few days?
*seeing Aan Sygg hurt & not being himself.
10)What cheer you up faster?
*Aan Sygg & Gurlfees.
11)How do you see yourself in ten years ten?
*26 yr old lady wif a good stable job & being able to support her familyy.
12)Who is currently the most important person to you ?
*Farhan Sygg & family.
13)What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you?
*gurlfees and friends
14)Would you rather be single and rich or Married but poor?
*married but poor.
15)What is the first thing you do everyday?
*bathe? haha.
16)Who is your best friend?
*my dearesstt gurlfees: Dora dear,Farah dear,Faris dear,Fizah dear.
17)If you fall in love with 2 person simutaneously,who will you pick?
*gosh.Farhan Syg of course.
18)If you love that person deeply but that person does not love you ?what will you ask that person?
*hey! let's just be friends aite? besties? =)

this is our fate,im YOURS.

2008-07-29T17:37:00.004+08:00

FARHANku sungguh dicintai.

Well you dawned me and you bet I felt it

I tried to be chill but you're so hot that I melted

I fell right through the cracks

Now I'm trying to get back

Before the cool done run outI'll be giving it my bestest

Nothing's going to stop me but divine intervention

I reckon it's again my turn to win some or learn some

But I won't hesitate no more, no more

It cannot wait, I'm yours

Well open up your mind and see like me

Open up your plans and damn you're free

Look into your heart and you'll find love, love, love, love

Listen to the music of the moment, people dance and sing

We're just one big family

It's our God-forsaken right to be loved love loved love love

So I won't hesitate no more, no more

It cannot wait I'm sure

There's no need to complicate

Our time is short

This is our fate, I'm yours

Won't you come onScooch on over closer dear

And I will nibble your ear

I've been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror

And bending over backwards just to try to see you clearer

But my breath fogged up the glass

And so I drew a face and I laughed

I guess what I be saying is there ain't no better reason

To rid yourself of vanities and just go with the seasons

It's what we aim to do

Our name is our virtue

But I won't hesitate no more, no more

It cannot wait I'm yours

There's no need to complicate

Our time is short

This is our fate, I'm yours

Well no no, well open up your mind and see like me

Open up your plans and damn you're free

Look into your heart and you'll find love love love love

Listen to the music of the moment come and dance with meI like one big family

-Jason Mraz Im Yours.

fuck the pain away.

2008-07-29T15:44:00.002+08:00

Stanwyck's yearning for the best memories we had.

48th day together.ILY.

for today i didnt turn up for school.simply because there's some things here to be taken care of at home.didnt wish to tell people what is it about really.yeah.a little too private but as i can say right now, i'm happy for the someone.someone i lost once has now returned back to me.god's will.my prayers are all answered at last.my dearest Abg Emi is back with our family once more.IMY alot dearestt abg.promise me NOT to leave me again.

aan sygg texted me last night.as per usual,it's the same old topic we've been on about.the flipside of us basically.how things change and in turn changed us too,bigtime.happy for him to adhere to his bestie's advice & stuff.i hope that will work out well.IF he puts in effort and improve the state he's in right now.well.as for me.i dont quite realise and know how bad or worse ive changed.but yah.maybe i should reflect on that once more.

from my point of view.i feel something really is lacking.well.you could really sense the difference but yah.u just dont know how in the world to just approach it.signs have shown.they are all proven but yah.as i say.i just dont know how to.

my love for you dear darla has never fade away.but sometimes i dont feel secure by who you are right now.how i wish we can both go back to where we were before.im yearning for tha badly.if you could only hear my cries,of how badly i wanted things to be,that i guess would help a little.but they are all just eating me up inside.dear farhan,I LOVE YOU.

for the rest of the afternoon till late evening,i guess i'm up mugging.yeah.eventhough im in a mental trap right now,i got to be smart in how i want things to turn out.gosh.i need that peace of mind.seriouslyy.things are just getting on my way.well.that's for today i hope.now practically waiting for his text and call.*wondering where and how is he right now.*